Whats brown and sticky? A massive shit.

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What was the pirate movie rated? It was rated R for its graphic depiction of the continuing violence in Somalia.

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Your mom is so ugly, she buys groceries at the grocery store.

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what did the cow said to the other cow? Moo

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Why don't women wear watches? In the technologically advanced age that we live in, the watch is rapidly being replaced with other electronic devices that tell time, such as cell phones or iPods.

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An impolite guy walks into a bar... and doesn't apologize to the bar.

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Why did Tesco not serve a black guy? Because he just happen to be holding a gun

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Michael J. Fox asked me if I wanted my drink shaken or stirred, did I really have a choice?

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why did the child go to school? Because he wants to succeed in life

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What happened when a myriad people decided to partake in a large party while staying in a small room? They managed to make a compromise. The party got split into two groups: 50% of the original total in each casual confinement. In the end, everybody had a great time and nobody got hurt.

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whats 2+2? gonorrhea.

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Sarah Palin

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What's black, and hangs from trees in my backyard? Blackberries

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Knock knock. It's me, the ratboy genius.

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Whats gay and has wheels? Alex Egbert, I lied about the wheels

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Knock knock. Who's ther? Your friend Billy i've been shot and need help

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What do you call a deaf man? It would be unwise to call him anything, as he would have difficulty hearing you.

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Guy 1: So who did you have sex with? Guy 2: I was Fucking Austria. Guy 1: What do you mean? Guy 2: Look it up.

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What is worse than getting a 30% on a test? Getting a 29% on a test.

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What is the main similarity of Darth Vader and Michael Jackson? They are both dead fathers.

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What do you call two black guys flying a plane? Pilots.

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What do you do when you find a robber holding a 19 pound sack of poultry? Think life through and try to find out how you had this coming.

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What's the difference between a dead baby in my garage and a Ferrari in my garage? I don't have a Ferrari.

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A: How do you make a fire with two sticks? B: Ask your mother, we did it last night.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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