Why couldnt the car move? It got blown up by a tank.

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What did the agnostic say when he turned blue? He said "wow why am I blue?"

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A lady in a bank was asked by the clerk to round the sum she wanted to raise from her account. She rounded it several times, but the clerk continued to insist that the sum needs to be rounded. She left the bank confused, with a coupon consisting of completely rounded sum of 691, 88$. Next day she returned with a coupon with a rounded sum of 690,88$. The clerk asked again the lady to round the sum. The lady started helplessly to cry and said she had rounded is already with a harp, and couldn't make it round anymore, she even removed the sharp 1 from the sum.

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what do trees like to drink? r o o t b e a r

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Knock, knock. "Who's there?" "Jehovah's Witness." "Jehovah's witness, who?" "Just Jehovah's Witness. Your doorbell is not working."

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I bet I can say the the whole Greek alphabet faster than any other person in the world. The whole Greek alphabet faster than any other person in the world.

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Omg its that superman nope chuck testa

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Why was the black man so good at basketball? Because he practiced.

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Your mums so stupid. She bought an apple for 35p even though the shop across the road sells them for 34p

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Bob: Whats the difference between a fish and a microwave? Steve: I don't know Bob: Daaaamn your dumb!

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What do you call one white guy surrounded by 10 BIG black guys? The most common NFL Offence

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What is blue and on the bottom of the pool. A drowned baby

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Ask me if I'm a grapefruit. -Are u a grapefruit? NO!

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Why did Jimmy cry? His mom raped him.

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Why are you so gay? Because I am unequivocally attracted to the same sex.

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Why did the hipster burn his mouth on a piece of pizza? Because the pizza was on fire.

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Knock knock. Who's there? John. John who? John Smith.

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Wanker

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how do you get an old man to fall? tip over his wheelchair

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guess what what that wasnt it

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Q. You guys want to here a joke? Kids: Yeah! A. Women's rights

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Why did the hipster burn his tongue? The tea he was drinking was at an unsuitable temperature for consumption resulting in the scalding of his mouth.

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Why can't bob fix it? I through a frige at him.he died.

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What did the Pitchfork say to the Gremlin? Nothing, because its a pitchfork, and gremlin's don't exist.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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