whats black and blue and red all over? my wife shhh!

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Whats more painful than falling onto a sharp stone? Suffering the loss of your mother and newborn brother in a tragic car accident on your birthday.

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Why didn't the man get to see his family on Christmas? He was blind.

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what do a heater and a dead baby have in common? a dead baby is only warm for a small period of time

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What happens if you roll a nickel down a street in Mexico? It eventually stops and lands on its side.

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What is square and grey? A grey square.

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What's worse than stepping on legos? Massive genocide

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What is life? It is a sexually transmitted disease which always ends in death. There is currently no known cure.

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what do you do when you see a black man getting hitted by a Mexican taxi? -Call 911

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yomamas so fat it made Ben kanobi say thats no moon thats yo mama!

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What did the boy with four arms get for Christmas? A Laptop. Why couldn't he use it? He had no fingers.

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What did the boy with no legs get for Christmas? Dance Dance Revolution

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A Black man, and Jewish man, and a Asian man walk into a bar. They then proceed to buy a drink, leave the bar, and move on with their day.

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I want to name my dog Syndrome. Then, when I teach him to sit, I can say "Down, Syndrome!"

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[Insert hurtful, yet spontaneous comment here.]

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why did the girl go into the kitcen? she was preparing a meal for her well safisticated family which had not ate dinner yet that day.

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What should you give your Italian plumber for a refreshment? Water, because he's probably working so hard that he's thirsty.

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whats the difference between Obama and Romney answer: one would have been a good president instead of a communist

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Why did the turtle cross the road? He was stapled to the chicken.

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How much does the Holo cost? Six million.

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homosexuals are gay

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His Royal Highness was hunting in the forest accompanied by his squires and hunting dogs. A man, screaming, ran wildly out of the brush and addressed the hunting party. He said, "DON'T SHOOT! I AM NOT A MOOSE!! PLEASE DO NOT SHOOT!!!!" The king calmly raised his rifle to his eye and fired, hitting the man in the temple, and instantly killing him. A squire frantically turned to the king and said "Sire! Why did you kill this man?! He CLEARLY said he was not a moose!" The King replied "Oh! I thought he said he WAS a moose..."

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Why did the fat man hit the ground before the skinny man? Because he jumped first.

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What do you call a 400 pound man eating chocolate? diabetic

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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