What was the pirate movie rated? It was rated R for its graphic depiction of the continuing violence in Somalia.

*Tell your listener to say knock knock* B: Knock knock A: Who's there? B: *awkward silence

A rabbi, a nun, a priest, a hooker, a stripper, 2 secret servicemen, a teacher, a midget, a ginger, a rodeo clown, a nascar driver, a homosexual native american, a heterosexual native american, 2 portuguese tuba players, an african american taxi driver, a blind man, his seeing eye dog, a bartender, 2 minor league baseball players, 3 lesbian mexican salsa dance instructors and a dwarf are all in a bar. They all had a good time and the teacher and one ol the portuguese tuba players ended up becoming facebook friends.

roses are red, violets are blue, i have a gun, shut the **** up.

Why did the little girl fall off of the swing? She had previously been in a car accident, in which all of her close family died and she was the only survivor. Since both her arms were stuck in between crushed components of the car, they had to be amputated on the spot. She was testing out the prosthetic arms she had been given when they failed, causing her to get a concussion, and putting her in a coma for the rest of her life.

A guy walks into a bar. He now has a broken collar bone.

What's the difference between a joke and an anti joke Bananas

Wanna here a joke? Womens rights

Q: Whats better than 10 baby's nailed to 1 tree. A: 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

A 14 year old walks into a bar. The bartender yells "Hey, no minors allowed!" The 14 year old yells back "Excuse me? Do you see a fvcking pickaxe?"

whats small and looks funny? A baby with a penis sewed to its face.

Guy 1: That's what she said! HAHAHA!!! Guy 2: That's what who said? Guy 1: I don't know. :/

Justin Bieber.

What happen to the ginger after he posted a joke? He was put in jail for 6 months, and analy raped in prision!

A man walks into a bar. He's covered in Ash because the north tower just collapsed.

Whats brown and sticky? A massive shit.

did you know that Hellen Keller had a tree house? "no" she didn't know either.

rosses are red violets are blue poems are hard alligator

What is the main similarity of Darth Vader and Michael Jackson? They are both dead fathers.

Want to hear a funny joke? Sure. Women's Rights. That's not even a joke. You don't get it. It's not even a sentence.

What's the difference between an old man and a child? The old man is older than the child

Why did the elephant cross the river? CAUSE YOLO (even though he died)

What happened to the peanut who went to New York City? He got a-salted

Why did robin get in the batmobile? Batman told him to

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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