Whats fat yellow and diabetic Brett lai lan

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Look whos talking Matt Critchley

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Why was Jerry Sanduski at K-Mart? He heard boys pants were half off!

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What did the fat man say when he was offered infinite french fries for life? Yes.

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Why does a ginger have no friends? Because it is a non sentient horizontal stem used for seasoning food, and thus incapable of forming complex social and emotional bonds with conscious organisms.

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A duck walks into a bar and says, "Have you got any grapes?" The bartender replies "No." The duck then leaves but returns the next day and again asks, "Have you got any grapes?" And again the bartender answers, "No." This happens again the next day and in annoyance the bartender yells, "If you come in tomorrow and ask if I have any grapes, then I will nail your feet to the floor!" The next day the duck came into the bar and asked, "Have you got any nails?" to which the bartender replied, "Yes." The duck then walked out of the bar

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why did Jen fall off the swing? because she had no arms. knock knock who's there not Jen

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You like penis, That's what you live up to.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding half a worm in your apple.

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This is a joke...that your supposed to laugh at.

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A man and a woman are in a bar. The man says, "Excuse me miss, but you're very attractive, may I please buy you a drink?" to which the woman replies, "Thank you very much, but I'm afraid I've never been to Mexico."

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As a stand-up comedian, I've been really interested in how comedians have recovered from jokes not hitting making fun of the fact. Recently, I was in a situation where a rhetorical question didn't hit, and anti-joking (lamenting on the lack of a punchline sarcastically) ended up generating the laugh I needed to move on! Hurray for Anti-jokes! Me: You know the gym Extreme Fitness? Audience: SILENCE Me: (sarcastically) Yes, exactly. That's exactly how that interaction went in my mind when I was practising at home. I ask question - audience responds euphorically - I continue with my joke... http://michaeljagdeo.wordpress.com/2012/01/29/anti-jokes-how-to-recover-when-a-joke-doesnt-hit/

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Why did the elephant fall down? He was shot by poachers.

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Q: A black man, A Mexican, And a Asian are in a car. Who Is Driving? A: It depends who is the owner of the car. .

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no pun intended

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What's 9+ 10?! 19

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Darnell has a 2 ounce gold chain around his neck. Gold is worth $1,639 per ounce. Where did Darnell steal the gold chain from?

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Roses are red, Violets are blue At least that's what I've been told But honestly I've never seen those flowers so I wouldn't know.

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What's a Mexicans favourite video game? It depends on his/her personal preferences.

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What did the parrot say to the dumb man? Nothing

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My friend harris is fat.

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what is the difference between peanut butter and a dead baby? dead babies dont stick to the roof of your mouth when you are eating them.

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Why did the girls ice cream melt? Because she was on fire.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was black

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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