Rosees are red Violets are blue I have schizophrenia and I do too

thumb_up thumb_down +22

yo mommas so ugly that as a child she was often teased for her looks.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

ok

thumb_up thumb_down +20

I am white, you are black, we can be friends, racism was abolished.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Q: What's blue and smells like baby. A: A choking baby.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

your friend is gay, but you are not. nothing happens

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What's green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it could kill you? A pool table

thumb_up thumb_down +20

how may i help you

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Q. Why did Steve Carell, the 40 year old virgin, fail to get laid? A. Erectile Dysfunctioning.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What do you call a black man on a swing? Depends on what his name is

thumb_up thumb_down +20

roses are red violets are blue i use refrigerators to keep my food cool

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What do you get when you jab a four year old with a pair of scissors? A warrant for your arrest.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

what do you call the man making meth in his basement? the police to stop inappropriate behavior from reaching the children of society.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Q: Why did the Unicorn cross the road? A: It didn't Unicorns are fictional creatures.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What do you call a dead black person? A corpse.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Did you know, even though penguins ARE birds... They don't live in volcanoes?

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What did Anne Frank do this weekend? Nothing. she died in the holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

I asked a Jewish girl for her number, so she rolled up her sleve

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What's better than having sex with your mother? Nothing. I'm in love with her, son.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap ...in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations])That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why was Abraham Lincolin President. He was elected by the people of the united states.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

MAKE TEA NOT WAR!

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What is a bad thing to see and is attached to a boy's body. The middle finger u dumb ass!

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did the fireman go to the police station? He didn't go to the police station, he went to the fire station.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops