A: When was rhe last time you touched yourself? B: A few seconds ago when I had an itch on my arm

whats better then a pile of dead babies? 2 piles of dead babies

how do you tell a politician that you hate him? politicians can be female, too.

Why didn't grandma ever return Johnathon's calls? Grandma was brutally murdered 2 years prior. Johnathon had issues believing that she was gone. He went on to live a life of pain and suffering, which would eventually lead to suicide at the age of 24.

What did one cat say to the other cat? Meow. What did one dog say to the other dog? Meow. Why was the man sad? He had a retarded dog.

what's white and goes up? a retarded snowflake

What did Santa say to the prostitute? "Merry Christmas!"

What's green and apple-y? You're gay.

Why was the dog crying? Do dogs even cry?

Hello.

What's more traumatising than watching your dad raping a man? Watching a man raping your dad.

A boy asked his dad Why are Chinese eyes like that. His dad replied there concentrating that's why there so smart The boy went up to a student in his class and said look I'm like you The teacher asked who told him that he said his dad The dad was called up by the school when the teacher told him what his son did he went GOOZILLA His wife asked him what he was up to and he said farting on her face when she was a sleep 3 days later he found out his wife was cheating on him he knocked on the door only to realize he was on drugs and that he never had a family.

Women's rights.

Why was the boy laughing? Because

What is worse than the holocaust? World War III.

What do you call when you see a man murder 8 black guys? The police.

Two straight men walk into a gay bar and promptly forget why they went to a gay bar when they are both clearly heterosexual.

Did it hurt when you fell from heaven, or have you been in a wheelchair all your life?

There's a redhead, a brunette and a woman with green hair walking down the street. A man asks them how they all came to have such beautiful and vibrant hair color. The redhead smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The brunette smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The woman with green hair blows her nose, and replies "It isn't natural, I'm rebelling against society's conformist ideals. Also I was not loved enough as a child." She has a cold.

I'd like to make this joke funnier but I can't. It's stupid. I don't even like it.

What did Thomas Jefferson's children call him? Grandpa

What do u call a dumb Asian. An american

i have a christmas tree.

Whats the best way to get to a girls heart? A knife.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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