A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says: Why the long face? The horse says: I'm a horse. We have long faces.

If you're reading this, you can read.

An airplane flies due north at 100 m/s through a 30 m/s cross wind blowing from the east to the west. Determine the resultant velocity of the airplane.

Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear. Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair. Fuzzy Wuzzy had cancer.

What's worse than having your t.v. stolen by a Mexican? Getting raped with a chainsaw.

What's the difference between a pheromone and a hormone? Hormones are secreted internally and trigger various biochemical pathways that cause certain effects. We all are familiar with the effects of testosterone and estrogen, both on the anatomy, and behaviour of humans. Pheromones are secreted externally, and have an effect on another creature in similar ways. Usually they have to do with attracting sexual partners or changing a sex partners behaviour or body in some way.

A seal walks into a club...and is taken in custody by animal control due to the club having a no animal policy.

The Chinese government. The way they treat their citizens just isn't funny.

Q: What did one muffin say to another? A: Nothing. Muffins don't talk, you idiot.

What did the black person use to peel a banana? His hands.

Knock Knock. Who's there? .

What is a pirate's favorite movie? A pirated movie.

Roses are red violets are blue I have altimers cheese on toast Srry bout the spelling. I couldn't REMEMBER!

Whats the difference between a black man and a white man? Their skin color

A man stepped on a nail. He died shortly after of lockjaw.

Thank you Jesus, for this wonderful meal we have tonight. De nada.

Why did the blind man die? He had eye surgery and the doctor told him when he first opened his eyes there would be a very bright light, turns out he also had alzheimers and wandered onto the train tracks

What's the most common way to become mentally challenged? Getting hit by a shovel a couple times

Hey wanna hear joke? ........ yeah .......me too

What did batman say to robin before they got into the car? Get in the car.

Knock knock Who's there? What are you, blind?

What do you say to a black man in the morning? Good morning

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Recycling anti-jokes

I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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