Sex education in Texas,

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Q: What is your favorite color? M: Blue

thumb_up thumb_down -5

(Guy)That's what she said. (His Girlfriend) And who is this she.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's tan, red, black and brown? Your face. Two days later... In the mausoleum. "Your face"

thumb_up thumb_down -5

knock knock whose there tim tim who just kidding its fred

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did the over-baring Chinese couple say to their son who got an A- in algebra? How do I know? I don't speak Chinese!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A local police officer pulls up to tell you something. Listen carefully: Three zebras have been spotted crossing the Mexican border. He goes into his truck, pulls out a can of marbles, peanut butter, seven velcro straps and a rhino horn covered in glitter. Your mission is simple: Kill the zebras using your equipment. You will be rewarded if you have enough peanut butter to make a sandwich after. Go now... Get it done.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Whats worse than bitting into a apple and finding a worm? Being the worm who just lost nearly half his whole house because some jerk decided to eat an apple on the ground, whom after eating the apple destroyed the worms self-esteem by making the comparison to the worse thing possible. Or being raped by Zeus in the form of a worm.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the woman spray a black man in the eyes with pepper spray, then promptly run away? Because the woman was a notorious criminal and was currently robbing the man's house, but was caught in the act so she used pepper spray as her last line of defense while she fled from the scene before the man could call the police to detain her and put her in prison for her crimes.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the duck cross the road? Because it was going to the destination he wanted to go to.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A man walks into a bar, then he leaves and goes home

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A homeless guy on the brink of starvation found one dollar lying on the street. He took it and bought a lottery ticket at the local drugstore. God was looking down on him with pity that day and decided that day that he would no longer be a vagabond. The next day, the homeless man won the lottery jackpot, worth 100 million dollars. He declared that on that day, he was the luckiest and happiest man alive. He then woke up in a pile trash.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

what's worse than finding a worm in your apple. finding an apple in your pet worm.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

These are some questions you should never ask on a first date: When you wipe do you throw your toilet tissue in the toilet or on a trash can? Do you smell your hands after you wipe? Do you you ever look down when you take a dump and see it come out? Have you ever picked your butt and then picked your nose with the same finger?

thumb_up thumb_down -5

You killed my brother and call me the antichrist? Its lovable: Jesus said on the cross, I shall return. Then he returned three days later to say goodbye to his people. Moral: What the **** are you Åsshats waiting for? The third coming? He died for their sins, not for yours... WELCOME TO HELL!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Whats Black and White and Red all over? A penguin in a blender.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Peaches eat leaches, that is why sneaches live on beaches.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How did Moses make his tea? He steeped the tea lives for around 5 minutes in hot water.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What does a eagle and a bunny have in common.. nothing they're two different animals.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did Joe not cross the road? Because the Pedestrian Crossing light said not to.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A donkey looks at a goat. The goat walks away.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Q: why was the women out of the kitchen? A: Probably to partake in one of her many hobbies.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

hi my name is matt mckeon and i like renata saggy tits !!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops