Knock Knock. Who's There? Timmy. YOU DON'T KNOW ME!!!!!

The Dane, the Norwegian and the Chinese where on a plane, and as the plane was malfunctioning, the pilot would shout: "We are overloaded! Toss out everything you can spare!" The Dane tossed out a box of Danish Salami, explaining they had enough of those in his country. The Norwegian tossed out a package of sweaters, explaining that they had enough of those in his country. Suddenly the Chinese jumped out without a given explanation, as time passed though, the surviving crew arrived to some conclusions... Moral: R.I.P Kim the 294834839483948th

A seal walks into a club... the seals freinds later inform him they are now at a bar the seal then walks into the bar... the seal was later beaten to death

If a girl sleeps with 20 guys, she's a slut. If a guy does the same... He's Gay.

What did the goose say to the other goose? Honk!

Why did the chicken cross the road? His whole family attempted to cross the road approximately 30 seconds earlier and were immediately struck by a moving vehicle traveling at 45 miles per hour. He crossed the road to try to comfort his family while they took their final breathes of life. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a man that had recently been laid off from his union job and came down with a disease that is considered uncurable by modern science.

How does a black chick tell if she's pregnant? When she pulls the tampon out, all the cotton is already picked.

What did the heroin addict get for Christmas? Aids from a used needle.

What's silent but deadly? Limnic Eruption.

what is big, black, and has hair on it. a big black guy with hair.

Carol never wore her safety goggles. Neither did Hellen Keller.

A man walks into a bar at 1 in the afternoon. He's the bartender and a fellow employee asked him to cover the afternoon shift.

A girl falls out of a tree. She got hit by a flying pig.

Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

When I was just a little kid, my daddy lest the house and we all joined him to wherever he wanted to live.

What do you call a man in a pool with no arms and legs? Bob

(joker) Do you like fishsticks? (recipient) "No" (any response from the joker at this point qualifies as anti joke)

What did one chick in a clothes shop say to another? That's cheap

A priest, R Kelly, and Michael Jackson walk into a bar. They proceed to molest small children.

Knock Knock Who's there? ........

How many black men does it take to change a light bulb? One, they're really capable people, unless they're handi-capped then they'll ask someone else to do it for them.

A man goes into the doctors office for his yearly checkup. The man waits patiently for several minutes until the doctor is ready to see him. After about ten minutes pass, the doctor is ready to see him. The man enters the doctors office. He passes all of the necessary tests. The doctor and him talk for a while. After a few minutes, the doctor says, "Okay, thanks for coming. See you next year." The man thanks the doctor and leaves.

Why was the man with one leg good at balancing on one foot? He used crutches.

want to hear a funny joke? what a coincidence so do I!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...