Patient: I thonk I'm gonna die Doctor: well will ya hurry up and die already? I've got to treat a kid with a paper cut.

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Why do black people love watermelon and fried chicken? Honestly who doesn't? Duh! Because most people do! Moral: Not so sure about the coolaid though...

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Why was the girl crying? She just got diagnosed with cancer you inconsiderate bastard.

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Q:Baby, baby, baby, oooh A:Thats what she said.

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what did the tree say when it fell down? Nothing it is humanly impossible for a tree to talk. Especially after it fell down. I mean that would hurt.

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I bought my daughter the Josef Fritzl advent calendar. The proceeds go towards abuse survivor charities.

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I know a kid named Ruslonia. What type of name is that?

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what do you call someone with one arm? Handicapped.

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What did the 14 year old girl get on her birthday? A cake that read, "You're adopted"!

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So you into art? You been to Louvre by the way?

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If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.

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Why can't Jade Goody go swimming? Because she's dead.

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A man had two horses. One was black and one was white. He cut the tail of one of them to tell them apart.

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What did your mom say when Quinn Griffith Randel walked in the door? Hi.

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A obese woman, a anorexic woman and a average weight woman sit down to eat. They all have a good time.

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What's liquid, clear, and tastes like water? H20

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What do you call a dinosaur eating a taco? Nothing, you are high.

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why does column have a letter n?

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What does Santa and a grape have in common? They're both purple, except Santa.

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Why didn't the black man get the scholarship? Because he didn't apply for it.

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The First National Tree Bank just closed down. Don't worry it started a brand new branch.

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Why did the man eat the cheese? because the man was a mouse

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Well, neither has he.

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Hey Eliza, thanks, while I appreciate the help, Alice is crying in a corner and refusing to get up, I wont lie, for a moment there I could "see voices and music" and valium has taken care of the ptsd (and blown most of my brain, which is nice for a change). With that said, im on 40 mg ritalin which is a lot, but I need it, besides I can handle the anxiety. I have no idea who the guy typing this is, but he is following me to the letter, so thats good enough, except his typos being worse than mine, which is pretty good for a guy that barely speaks english. Sorry Eliza, but Alice is having a breakdown here, ill talk her down a bit first, she tries to hide it, but she is far more worried about me than I am, which is nice, just not like this, ill be right back with you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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