What was the pirate movie rated? It was rated R for its graphic depiction of the continuing violence in Somalia.

How many dead lions can feed a bluejay? Bluejays don't eat dead or living lions, so this is highly improbable.

What is worse than getting a 30% on a test? Getting a 29% on a test.

Why is the black boy made fun of at school? Because the kids at his school are racist.

Why do undertakers wear ties? Because their profession is very serious, and it is important that their appearance has a degree of gravitas.

Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side. Knock knock? Whos there? the Chicken.

What do you get when you cross and elephant and a dog? Nothing, because you cannot breed creatures of different geniuses.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer Pressure.

What's the longest, hardest thing on a black man? His femur.

Sometimes I light my hair on fire and pretend I'm a candle.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

whats the problem with black and mexican jokes? once youve heard juan youve heard jamal

Hey, I just met you and i am crazy, but? here's my room key let's make a baby.

What's The Difference Between a Chicken and a Human. Well a Chicken Is A Chicken and a Human Is a Human.

Guy: If I could re-arrange the alphabet, I would put I and u together. Girl: Really because if I could r-arrange the Alphabet I would put f and u together

Michael J. Fox asked me if I wanted my drink shaken or stirred, did I really have a choice?

Why did the cookie go to the doctor? It didn't, a cookie is a food, therefore it doesn't have working organs.

George Bush.

Sarah Palin walks into a bar and the bartender tells her to get the f*&k out.

Two guys walk in a bar, and they die.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Yes.

So three Mexicans, a black man, and 2 white men enter a room. They promptly sever their penises and jump out the window because they are all members of a strange cult.

A black guy and a white girl are walking toward each other in a dark alley. Which one takes off his/her clothes first? The black guy as he is closer to home and therefore closer to his bathroom where he took a shower after a hard day's work.

Why do you give a blond a gun You dont

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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