What has four legs, but cannot walk? A giraffe with polio.

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who is awesome? no one...

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how do you get a rat out the house you lift it up and put it outside

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What do you call a man in a pool with no arms and legs? Bob

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A man walks into a vagina

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Whats long, hard, and filled with seaman... a mans penis

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God. God.

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What's worse than watching the Hunger Games? Playing the Hunger Games

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So this moose walks into the super-market and asks the lady woman at he counter "Got any potatoes?" Lady woman says "Down Isle 5" So the moose goes down isle 5 and there isn't any potatoes

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I like your hair

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whats worse than getting killed by a random tomahawk in COD mostly anything because COD is only a video game

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Finding TWO worms in your apple.

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A frog walked into a bar. Except by frog I meant Frenchman, and by bar I meant English pub. The Englishmen in the bar kill the Frenchman in a display of territoriality.

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My Muslim friend is always late to everything. We call him 9/12.

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Why was the boy crying? Because his dad comes home drunk every night and beats him.

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Why were people laughing when Muhammad Ali signed autographs for his fans? He was making jokes regarding his Parkinson's syndrome in order to elevate an otherwise melancholy experience for the audience.

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What do you get when you cross a chicken and a fox? An eaten chicken.

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Guy- Wanna hear a joke about my dick? Nah, it's too long. Girl- Wanna hear a joke about my vagina? Nah, you'll never get it.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" After hearing this common expression, the horse looks up at the bartender. With this look, the bartender realizes that he has been speaking to I'll Have Another. Aware his faux pas, the bartender apologizes and pours him a free drink. The free drink does little for I'll Have Another's crushed dreams.

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How many babies can you fit in a bottle? None, a bottle is too small

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A man walks into a bar. He has a beer and then goes home.

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What do you call a dead baby who died by getting ran over by a car? Jimmy

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Q; what did the gangster say after he and his gang robbed a bank? A;Hey boys lets go drink some soy milk (After that his gang killed him) but the moral of the story is to not rob banks or take drugs

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i found the cure to cancer.......AIDS

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops