- Anti Joke

Why did the little girl fall off of the swing? She had previously been in a car accident, in which all of her close family died and she was the only survivor. Since both her arms were stuck in between crushed components of the car, they had to be amputated on the spot. She was testing out the prosthetic arms she had been given when they failed, causing her to get a concussion, and putting her in a coma for the rest of her life.

A sheep goes up to to a horse and asks "Does you speak sheep?".The horse replies ''Neigh''.

What did Sarah Palin say as she gazed to the West? "I really wish my daughter hadn't gotten pregnant."

OneBigAssMistakeAmerica

a women walks into a room and says she got a good job..wait thats not possible..

Why did the penis rape the vagina, because it felt good!

What happens when you put a cat in an oven? Don't, because it will die.

i like serious. serious means business. business means cash. cash means money. money makes me happy and when i'm happy you dont die

Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? I lost my tractor.

Where's Justin Beiber? With his girlfriend.

Three men are on a plane. (Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. Without question, the stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. With no reaction, the man receives the bomb, then throws it out the window. Upon landing, the first man sees a woman crying. With a sympathetic heart, he asks what's the matter. She replies, "I was walking down the street, and an orange came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man brushes the event off as a coincidence. The second man sees another woman crying. Upon asking her what's the matter, she replies, "I was walking down the street, and an apple came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man, confused, apologizes and walks away. The third man sees a woman hysterically laughing. Intrigued, he inquires her jolly. She manages to state through her hysteria, "When me fart, me whole house blow up!"

A man walks into a bar. He's covered in Ash because the north tower just collapsed.

did you know that Hellen Keller had a tree house? "no" she didn't know either.

Roses are grey Violets are grey Everything is grey I'm color blind.

When is homework not homework? When it is turned into the teacher.

Why can't humans fly? Because there is simply no natural way of achieving lift with the bodies that we have. We must use other means to become airborne such as planes and hot air balloons.

Why don't women wear watches? In the technologically advanced age that we live in, the watch is rapidly being replaced with other electronic devices that tell time, such as cell phones or iPods.

A rabbi, a nun, a priest, a hooker, a stripper, 2 secret servicemen, a teacher, a midget, a ginger, a rodeo clown, a nascar driver, a homosexual native american, a heterosexual native american, 2 portuguese tuba players, an african american taxi driver, a blind man, his seeing eye dog, a bartender, 2 minor league baseball players, 3 lesbian mexican salsa dance instructors and a dwarf are all in a bar. They all had a good time and the teacher and one ol the portuguese tuba players ended up becoming facebook friends.

What did the boy say to the Vietnam veteran? Where are your legs?

An Irishman walked into a pub and ordered a pint. He had planned to just have one but ended up having two since he'd had a rough day at work. His wife was slightly annoyed that he came home smelling of beer.

what did the gay guy get for his birthday aids

Why did robin get in the batmobile? Batman told him to

iff god whas funny why thit he let your mother be raped and your sister murdered en iff satan whos a ice cream will he taste sweet ?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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