Roses are red, Violets are blue. Get in the van.

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I have the answer to why the child stepped on a ball-he was dumb

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Q:What happened to the fat man that rode a roller coaster? A:He had fun

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What do you call a mexican doing drugs? An average pablo

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Knock knock How is ? Bond ,James Bond!

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I once saw a picture of a man who was bloodily murdered with his testicles replacing his eyes. then i had a nightmare, that was completely unrelated

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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How do you make a mime cry? Hit him with an axe

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Why did susie fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms... Why didn't she get up? She didn't have any legs... Why didn't anyone help her? She didn't have any friends. Then she died

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What do friends and trees have in common? They will both fall over after being hit multiple times with an ax.

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What did the jobless man get for Christmas? Fired...

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Carl has 300 candy bars. He eats 295. What does Carl have? Diabetes. Carl has diabetes.

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What does a gay horse eat? Low-energy foods should only be fed to horses who are not regularly being worked and participating in high performance. According to the University of Kentucky's College of Agriculture, energy is vital to horses who need to perform their best as it aids many of the body's functions including muscle contraction, respiration and circulation. Only feed a low-energy diet to an idle horse and feed a high-energy diet to an older or sickly horse and to a working horse.

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What do you call a hot underaged girl. off limits i am her father.

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Q: How did the Irishman die? A: He was old.

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What do you get when you cross a parrot and a beach ball? A beach ball with a parrot design on it.

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A potato walked into a bar and ordered a large bowl of french fries

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How do you make a dead baby float? Ice cream, root beer, and a dead baby.

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You are in a sealed room with Joseph Stalin, Osama bin Laden, and Hitler and have a revolver with two bullets. Who do you shoot? None of them. You awkwardly set the gun down and wonder how to get out of this room filled with three corpses.

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what du u call a aplle raisni in the hotr sun? graep duahahahahahahejejejejejejahahahejejejwyan

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What do you call a banana that just got pealed A banana

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I never knew I was dyslexic. Then one day I showed up to a toga party dressed as a goat.

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Q: How many children did it take to screw in a light bulb? A: The light bulb was already screwed in and exploded after excessive tampering

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What did the fish say when it hit a wall? Nothing. Fish cannot talk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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