I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What's black and white and red all over. Half a zebra

thumb_up thumb_down +9

how makes licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop? depends on how determined you are to find out

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What's black and doesn't work? My Blackberry, but luckily it was still under guarantee and the situation was solved swiftly and relatively drama free.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

once you go black your credit goes wack

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Hey, i just met you. And this is crazy! But im on bathsalts ! *GAUH* Your face looks tasty!! :D

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A guy walks into a bar and asks the bartender for some water. The bartender replies: "Sorry, we don't have any." The man responds: "Sorry, I'm drunk." He walks out.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Whats the difference between a loser and a winner there places

thumb_up thumb_down +9

You're at a funeral & your phone goes off and the ringtone is dead and gone

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do you call a black man with a Ph.D? Doctor.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

ROSES ARE RED VIOLETS ARE BLUE I HAVE AIDS NOW YOU DO TOO

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Once a upon a time there was a boy whom likes cheese. The boy: I like Cheese and thats the end of the story

thumb_up thumb_down +9

How do you drown a blonde? You hold her head under water until water gets into her lungs and she cant breathe.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What happened when the man got into the taxi? The driver shot him 17 times in the chest and ran away

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do you call a pile of dead children? Home

thumb_up thumb_down +9

one day a guy walks into a bar. he buy's a drink then walks hapily home by Mad James

thumb_up thumb_down +9

If you go to an animal shelter to get a pet god, you may be dyslexic.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do you do if you can't go to the Wednesday Night Market on Wednesday? You go on Thursday

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What did the black person use to peel a banana? His hands.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

KNOCK! KNOCK! Who is it? Wood pecker. Wood pecker who? KNOCK! KNOCK!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

There once was a man from Nantucket. He's dead now.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Asians

thumb_up thumb_down +7

"Oi Tom" "What Tom?" "What did Tom say to Tom?" He was talking to himself Such a bad anti-joke

thumb_up thumb_down +7

How do you tell the difference between a pig and a sea pig? If you open your mouth and it fills with water, you are an idiot

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops