what did the blonde mail to her boyfriend? nothing, blonde's can't write.

Why wasn't Jesus born in Poland? Because if he's an actual historical figure he would have been born in modern day Palestine.

Do you speak alien? Hola.

Why shouldn't you worry about having a baby? Because with all these jokes, babies aren't even going to be around anymore. "What's funnier than a dead baby?" "A dead baby in a clown costume"

A dog walk into a bar, and the bartender asks, "What"ll it be?" The dog then breaks into tears as he realizes the bartender is his father's gay husband.

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

Whats fat yellow and diabetic Brett lai lan

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because it's in a chicken coop.

What do you do if there's a rabid elephant chasing behind you, a vicious jaguar to your right, a rearing horse to your left, and a bloodthirsty lion in front of you? Innoculate yourself with a rabies vaccine, prod the jaguar on the nose with a stick (they hate that and will probably flee as a result), speak softly and calmly to the horse and encourage the lion to go for the elephant instead of you. You will probably still die as a combined result of mauling and trampling, and it's unlikely that you'll have two rabies vaccines to hand by chance for such situations, but your chances of survival will be minimally improved.

What do you call a Mexican? Whatever his name is you racist.

brittney griner

whats polish and black a polish black person

What do you call a lawyer without a brain? -Dead

What is the difference between a black man and a pizza? A pizza can feed a family

What did batman say to robin before they got in the car Get in the car

Your mom is so fat, that when she stepped on the scale she was disappointed with the number that appeared.

Aaaaakkkkkiiiiiinnnnfffffeeeeennnnnwwwwaaaa

What was the joke about that woman with altsimers again? Ironically I forgot.

your mums so fat that shes HUGE!!!!

Your mother lives so loosely that she has several terminal diseases and only has 3 weeks to live.

Q: What did Hitler say to the Rabbi? A: I don't like you.

What smells like old people and is white? Talcum Powder.

What did Batman say to Robin before getting in the Batmobile? " Hey Robin, get in the Batmobile."

What did the virgin say to the car salesmen? Hello, I'm really interested in buying a car today.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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