What did the sniper say when a newsreporter asked what he felt when he shot a terrorist? The sniper replied: Recoil.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the Shell Station.

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A nhiger walked up to a lemonade stand and he said to the man running the stand. "do you have any lemonade" the man said "no. we don't serve nhigers lemonade. but you can drink your own piss boy, thats home made.." the nhiger waddled away (waddle waddle) till the very next day. The nhiger walked up to the lemonade stand with a lawsuit file right in his hand and said "you are legally required to serve me lemonade" the man said "fu(k you nhiger go back to where you came go back to Africa it's full of aids" the nhiger said "goodbye".... i'm too lazy too finish this off so i'll spoil the ending, the nhiger was actually a smelly pakistanian, which was actually a dirty chi-nk in costume. let's just say lawsuits were filed but the lemonade stand owner had casey anthony's lawyer and in the end never had to serve fu-cking nhiger ,smelly pakies or dirty chin-ks again :) The End. Happily Ever After.

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from south park what do u call a jew on a rope no one ever said the answer, so my answer is a jew on a rope.

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What do you call a alcaholic walking down the street..... Roadkill

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How many fingers do most people have? 10

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LOLLLLLL! Lakers? making me laugh so hard! LMAO

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America were the American dream is something only foreigners believe in

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Q Whats the difference between a pich fork with watermelons and a pitch for with dead babies stuck on. A The pitchfork with the dead babies were severly shot in the kidneys and then the heart. Blake

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A penguin is walking through the snow, and comes across a polar bear with a hat on. He stops and stares at the polar bear for a second and then compliments the polar bear on his hat. The polar bear smiles and promptly consumes the penguin, building up a fat layer for the coming Winter.

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Brian finally kissed a girl on the lips... After her daily whore shift of blowjobs -Ap

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A Chinese man a Mexican and an American are all on a plane. They are all trying to get rid of stuff they have to much of in their country. The chinese man throws out a bowl of rice and says " we have to many of these in our country" the mexican throws out a taco and says " we have to many of these in our country" the American throws out the mexican and says "we have to many of these in our country"

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You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society.

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Knock Knock I'm sorry but the new don't ask don't tell laws require me to not answer but do feel free to come in for some tea.

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Why did the man walk into a bar? Coz he felt like it.

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Your mama's so fat, she can't even find clothes that fit her well.

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How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen. Its was her funeral

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how do you make a black person stop drowning you take your boot of his head

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The probability of someone watching you is proportional to the stupidity of your action

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If a black person gets a tan, what do you get? A burned black sausage.

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Q : What is the similarity between me and my friend? A : We both are crazy

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Why are fire trucks red Well fire trucks have 4 wheels, and they have 8 people in them, 4+8, is 12, there are 12 inches in a foot, a foot is a ruler, Queen Elizabeth was a ruler, Queen Elizabeth was a boat, boats sail the seven seas, fish are in the seven seas, fish have fins, the Finns defeated the Russians, Russians are red, And that is why fire trucks are red.

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I like my 40's like I like my women, in ABUNDANCE.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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