Yo mamma so fat, she is going on a diet and is very sensitive about her weight.

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Whats a welfare? Its what keeps you alive.

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What looks like a flower, smells like a flower, and feels like a flower, but isn't a flower? Just kidding it's a flower

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Why did the black man go to church? Because his father died.

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Where can I find a good Prostitute? Your Parents House.

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OR SOMETHING! VOLUME ONE SPECIAL ALPHA MAN EDITION: What do you do if you are in the jungle, and surrounded by a tiger, and a jaguar and have only one bullet left in the rifle? You shoot the damn jaguar in its tire, and RIDE THE GODDAMN TIGER BACK HOME! MORAL MAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN! THE FRIENDLY NEIGHBORHOOD R*PIST!(Yes I also wrote the original kay?)

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The itsy bitsy spider climbed up the water spout. Heavy rain came down and killed him.

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WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

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Q : What is the similarity between me and my friend? A : We both are crazy

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So a horse walks into a bar... I forget the rest of the joke but you're mom is a whore..

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What's blue and has two windows ? The sky, i lied about the windows.

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I like my 40's like I like my women, in ABUNDANCE.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a serial rapist.

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What's big, red, has green and puple spots and responds to "here boy"? Nothing, not to my knowledge anyway!

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The probability of someone watching you is proportional to the stupidity of your action

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What's funny? A joke. What's funnier than a joke? Two jokes.

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How do you kill a blue elephant? With a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a red elephant? Spray paint it blue then shoot it with a blue elephant gun

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Why are people attacking the Jews we gave you so much things like: Television (Thomas Edison) Electricity (Thomas Edison) Weapons (Arvin Humbergs) Wifi (Edcolsin Vinstein) Be gr8 ful without us your nothing

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Knock Knock! Come in..

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Jesus steps out of a boat, and walks across the water to shore. He's such a show of. Only an attention whore would leave a boat and walk across water for no good reason.

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How many jews does it take to- I have alzheimers

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Two men walk into a bar. One gets drunk, goes home, savagely beats his wife, and goes to jail for domestic abuse.

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Two ducks are in a bathtub. One duck says, "Hey, pass me the soap." The other duck says, "What do I look like, a type writer?"

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Q:What's the greatest part about having sex with twenty five year old girls? A: There's 20 of them

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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