if you read this you are gay

When is homework not homework? When it is turned into the teacher.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It had just escaped from the slaughterhouse and ran for its life.

What will you be doing right before you die? ... ... living.

What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

What is the main similarity of Darth Vader and Michael Jackson? They are both dead fathers.

What has feathers, and is known to fly? A bird

An impolite guy walks into a bar... and doesn't apologize to the bar.

What's the difference between an old man and a child? The old man is older than the child

Why did the elephant cross the river? CAUSE YOLO (even though he died)

What did the Mexican firefighter name his twin boys? Thomas and David after his father and grandfather.

What do you do when you find a robber holding a 19 pound sack of poultry? Think life through and try to find out how you had this coming.

A rabbi, a nun, a priest, a hooker, a stripper, 2 secret servicemen, a teacher, a midget, a ginger, a rodeo clown, a nascar driver, a homosexual native american, a heterosexual native american, 2 portuguese tuba players, an african american taxi driver, a blind man, his seeing eye dog, a bartender, 2 minor league baseball players, 3 lesbian mexican salsa dance instructors and a dwarf are all in a bar. They all had a good time and the teacher and one ol the portuguese tuba players ended up becoming facebook friends.

what did the gay guy get for his birthday aids

Why did the little girl fall off of the swing? She had previously been in a car accident, in which all of her close family died and she was the only survivor. Since both her arms were stuck in between crushed components of the car, they had to be amputated on the spot. She was testing out the prosthetic arms she had been given when they failed, causing her to get a concussion, and putting her in a coma for the rest of her life.

OneBigAssMistakeAmerica

What's the longest, hardest thing on a black man? His femur.

whats the problem with black and mexican jokes? once youve heard juan youve heard jamal

A man walks into a McDonald's and proceeds to buy a burger, unfortunately a man was robbing the fast food restaurant, what did the man do. Buy a burger

What happened when a myriad people decided to partake in a large party while staying in a small room? They managed to make a compromise. The party got split into two groups: 50% of the original total in each casual confinement. In the end, everybody had a great time and nobody got hurt.

Why did the beach ball pop? Because it stepped on a sharp chocolate chip cookie!

How is nothing something if it is nothing?...

A man goes to Church he meets God nothing happens

Q. Where do snowmen keep their money? A. A snowman is an anthropomorphic snow sculpture made of frozen water. They therefore cannot earn, keep or have any use for money.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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