How many kids with ADHD does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just one. He might have trouble focusing, but his ADHD in no way prevents him from completing such a task.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the Black man drown? Because he could not and did not know how to swim. Because he could not afford the lessons to learn how to swim. Because he does not have the financial means to afford a lesson in swimming. Because he is of a low socio-economic level.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? Gangrape

thumb_up thumb_down -20

There is an Asian, an American, and a Mexican on a falling plane. The pilot announces that the plane is plummeting out of the sky and says that he needs to drop the cargo. The pilot drops the cargo but the plane is too heavy still. The pilot tells the passengers to drop some personal belongings. The Asian drops rice, the Mexican drops his guns, and the American throws the Mexican and yells "Remember the Alamo!".

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A man took his son out to play catch. The boy didn't even try to catch the ball. After that the man took his son to the amusement park to have fun. The boy didn't even try to have fun. Then the man took his son to the burger place nearby. Once again the son didn't even touch his food. Finally the man lost his temper and beat his seemingly ungrateful son and cried over the fact that his son was mentally retarded.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

they say that cancer can't pass but why do three our your uncles have it

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Why do you give a blond a gun You dont

thumb_up thumb_down -30

No, I still have to make sense of some facts bits and pieces here, and thinking is pretty much the only thing I can do at this moment, so why would my doppelganger wannabe call me from her mothers place?

thumb_up thumb_down -36

What did the man on a business trip to Japan say to his wife on the phone? The nuclear reactor in the next city over is melting down as we speak. If I don't see you again, I love you.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

Hello, nice to meet you.

thumb_up thumb_down -58

Why did the alligator travel through time? To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down +131

When is homework not homework? When it is turned into the teacher.

thumb_up thumb_down +95

Why did Doris have no control over her bladder? Because she was old and suffered catastrophic incontinence

thumb_up thumb_down +43

A Mexican, a Jew and an African walk into a bar. Now, it seem it was the Jew's turn to pay for drinks. So, all three ordered drinks, and the Jew paid for them.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

it all started when it all started when i was born because i was the resault of a broken condom and thats why he left. shortly after my mother killed herself. well thats the way the cookie crumbles. its not a joke i just needed to tell someone.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

A child in Africa developed Malaria. He became very sick and died.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

An American guy, Chinese guy, and Black guy are on a boat. Who jumps off first? Hopefully no one jumps off, especially because the ocean current is strong. They should call the coast guard if they are lost and find a safe way back to shore.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Whats the difference between a baby and a watermelon? Ones fun to hit with a sledgehammer. The other one is a watermelon.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What do you call a man who stole from a thief? A thief, no matter whom you are stealing from the consequences are dire.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the policeman arrest the black man? He had commited a crime and murdered somebody.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

whats brown, lying in a ditch, and is covered in cookie crumbs? a girl scout that got hit by a truck

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Arnold Schwarzenegger has a big one. Lady Gaga has a small one. Madonna doesn't have one. What is it? A last name.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Ted Haggard.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Q: Whats better than 10 baby's nailed to 1 tree. A: 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops