Paul walker: Breaks, stop Breaks: no

thumb_up thumb_down +4

whats long, hard, and full of semen? A submarine

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. The man leaves in a hurry, to cook for his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

You're so gay that you lost your virginity to someone of the same gender.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

So does Blake

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Your momas so fat her doctor put her on a diet plan.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did the blind kid get for Christmas? Same ones he got last year.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why is the fat kid on the ground crying? Because I hit him with a shovel

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did the dog say to the house? Roof

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did batman say to robin before they got into the batmobile? Get in the batmobile.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How did the conductor survive the Electric Chair? - He was a bad conducter

thumb_up thumb_down +4

whats funnier than 24? 25

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Once upon a time there was a pure and beautiful girl who lived with her step-mother and her two step-sisters. They made her live in the basement and had her do all the chores while they went to parties. Then social workers came and relocated her to a foster family.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Your momma is so fat that when she fell over, she couldn't get back up without help, and she probably got several bruises.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm in it? Biting into an apple and finding 2 worms in it, what's worse than that? The holocaust, whats worse than that? Biting into an apple and finding 3 worms in it

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's the difference between a piano and a goldfish? One's a piano, the other is a goldfish.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

I'm not saying your mom's ugly, but I like pancakes.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What kind of bread makes pickles? Dill Dough

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Whats white and can talk? Snow, i lied about the colour

thumb_up thumb_down +4

You just read this ..

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you call two gay black men in one sleeping bag? There names

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did Mufasa miss his doctor's appointment? Because he was trampled to death by wildebeest

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops