Whats the difference between a Ferrari and a bag of dead babies. I don't have a Ferrari in garage.

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Matt Gregory Harrington is a bender, pylon, hoser, duster tripod, and puck bunny!!!!

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what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? finding two worms in your apple

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I used to be an adventurer like you, Then I settled down in a quiet place in the woods with a girl and raised a family.

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Caca.

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What did the man do after he rented a movie? He watched it

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TWO ROADS DIVERGED IN A WOOD

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When is a door not a door? When your burns down.

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Why was the woman in the kitchen? She was hungry.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? I don't know, why don't you go ask him?

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Man :A homo-sexual panda walks into a gay bar.... Homosexual Panda : Wait...wait I'm gonna stop you right there. I will not take part in this odd joke, so just ummmmmm ya. And another thing, my species is extremely offended by your inferior remarks. Why can't homosexual pandas just have piece? Man 1: Were the hell did you come from? Homosexual Panda: My mother's uterus same as you, retard.

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I hate chocolate. I hate it so much. It sickens me. The only thing I hate more than chocolate is people that like chocolate. I hate them even more. Do you know what happened to the last person I met that liked chocolate? NOTHING

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Knock knock Who there? A mute Bullshit

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: So it could get hit by a car, to prove that chickens have free will, and have every right to cross a road without any particualar reason.

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Why didn't cancer cross the road? Because it was to busy taking my family.

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What is the difference between a baby and a rat? I don't have a rat in a cage

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why did jimmy win the lottery? WAFFLE

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How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood?  The woodchuck's ability to chuck has been left indeterminable. Therefore until the wood chuck's prowess in wood chucking is brought to light we must leave it a variable. Using the coefficient (L) to represent wood that can possibly be chucked. Then using (C) to represent the life cycle of said wood chuck chucking. We are also assuming this woodchuck will remain vigilante and not require food or sleep for the entire duration of chucking ultimately lowering is maximum chucking output. From this we can determine the W.C.P.S. (wood chucks per second). Finally subtract the remaining wood (RW) from the chucked total and we have rendered that :  L(W.C.P.S) - (C -RM/t) = X

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What did the kid with no legs get for Christmas ? A treadmill

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how did the fat man get up the stairs he walked

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It is so hard to write an antijoke.

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What is green and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

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Why was the woman?

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what do you use to blindfold chinese person? dental floss!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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