yo mama has one big titty and one small titty and the call the bitch paul

*Knock knock* I thought no one was home so I left... Turns out my grandma hung herself

Knock knock.. Who's there? Breaking. Breaking who? Im breaking up with you.

Q : What is the similarity between me and my friend? A : We both are crazy

A:Hi, do you like to blow bubbles? B:Yea... A:Hi, my names bubbles

Whats worse than it raining on your birthday? 911

why did the girl cry because she was raped

Knock Knock I'm sorry but the new don't ask don't tell laws require me to not answer but do feel free to come in for some tea.

If an orange is orange then why isn't a banana called a yellow? Because the word 'banana' comes from the Arabic word for finger as it obviously resembles a finger. The person that named the orange was equally lazy, but just not Arabic.

100 chefs walk into a bar

What do you call a boy with no arms or legs and an eyepatch? names...

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? 9,405 licks (this may not be reliable I lost count since I kinda just bit it)

so a black guy goes to a hot dog eating contest how many does he eat? enough to win.

How many jews does it take to- I have alzheimers

why did the mom beat up her son with downs because he was matt daly

Is that your face or is your dog walking backwards.

Why are cats mammals? Because they are descended from primordial mammals in the distant past which are the common ancestors of all mammals.

Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

What's more annoying than a mosquito? the Sandy Hook Massacre

What do you get if you cross a egg and toast? Egg n soldiers.

Why did the ship get lost at sea? The captain was a piece of bread.

How come there aren't any Mexicans on Star Trek? The show already had several minority characters, and the producers felt that the addition of a Hispanic actor or actress would have added nothing of value to the series.

what's gay as AIDS? The way you got it

A man is talking with his friend when suddenly he picks up a banana. He starts talking with the banana, and after a while of conversing the man sadly puts down his banana and says to his friend, "I'm sorry but your son has just died in a horrible accident."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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