Andrew's a bald wankstain.

An Asian man and an Irish man are standing at the bus stop, chatting casually, while waiting for the bus to arrive. The Irish man then turns to the Asian and says, "Despite our blatant differences in both race and culture, perhaps someday when we are both available, we can meet and talk civilly about our everyday lives over a cup of coffee."

What do you call a black man stealing your tv? A thief

roses are red and violets are in fact violet

Did you hear about the kidnapping in Pennsylvania? He woke up...

What do you call a man with no legs? A cripple

waiter! waiter! theres a fly in my soup! the waiter immediately retrieved a new soup and gave them a 50% discount for the misshap.

My penis is big... not.

Knock Knock? Whos there? Not Madeleine McCann.

whats worse, being kicked in the balls or giving birth? losing an arm to meningitis

A boy walk in. What did you think I was gonna add "into a bar"? Also, boys under the age of 21 aren't allowed to drink.

What's worse than public speaking? Public masterbation. *Spelled it wrong purposly to bypass the filter*

Why did the man talk to the potato? Because hes stupid.

Your mum is so overweight, she is at risk of heart disease, I highly recommend she visits her GP.

What did the homosexual community have last night? A protest for gay rights.

What happened to the blonde who blew out her birthday candles? Her hair caught on fire

The EPA.

Whats faster than a black guy with a TV? His brother with a VCR.

In this country, you gotta get the money first. Then when you get the money, you get the power. Then when you get the power, you get shot the F*** up at the end of Scarface.

Which of the following is the biggest? A. 7 B. 17 C. 71 D. Yo mama

What is red and sits in the corner? A naughty strawberry.

cop arrests a jew and interrogates him Jew. i aint telling you nothing cop: really cop pours a bag of coins on the table jew: thats about $7.80 cop: you can have it if you tell us what we want to know jew: ok jew: i stole the money 123

What's worse than being swallowed by a blue whale? Being swallowed by a bule whale with herpes.

whats super and the champions of europe? Leeds United

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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