Your momma's so fat when she walks into a restaurant she orders salad.

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George Bush.

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Why did the black man get a life sentence in prison? Because he was involved a mass stabbing in a night club London which saw 4 local teenage girls lose there lives.

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Why did the person post a real joke with bad grammar and spelling on anti-joke.com? They didn't flippin' understand the point of the website.

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A 14 year old walks into a bar. The bartender yells "Hey, no minors allowed!" The 14 year old yells back "Excuse me? Do you see a fvcking pickaxe?"

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A man enters a bar, and says: "It is impossible to drown in an elevator" This is incorrect.

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Why did the wiener dog fight the cock. Because it was a cock-fight.

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wanna hear a joke? katie chandler

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Why do you give a blond a gun You dont

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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Your moma's so fat, she's got type 2 diabetes

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what did the blind santa say to the jewish child jewish people don't believe in santa...awkward.

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Why was the little Jewish girl sad? Because neo-Nazis killed her family.

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What was the pirate movie rated? It was rated R for its graphic depiction of the continuing violence in Somalia.

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How many dead lions can feed a bluejay? Bluejays don't eat dead or living lions, so this is highly improbable.

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What is the easiest way to babysit a black kid? Find an activity that you can both relate to and enjoy. Hopefully after doing this for a while, the youngster will become tired and fall asleep. You can then watch TV, read or talk on your cell phone until his or her parents get home.

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your mommy so gehto shes black

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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whats brown, lying in a ditch, and is covered in cookie crumbs? a girl scout that got hit by a truck

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How are a bucket and a purple shovel alike? Coincidentally they both are registered sex offenders.

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Whats plastic and phonie a phone

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A man walks into a bar... ouch. He received a minor concussion from the impact of the cement wall, and a slight goose egg on his forehead.

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Your mother is so good in the kitchen that we all asked for a second helping.

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Why was the baby going so fast? It was tied to a bus.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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