How Do Bulls Drive Cars? They cant, they have hooves making it impractical for a Bull to Drive a car.

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Sarah Palin walks into a bar and the bartender tells her to get the f*&k out.

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A young boy is concerned about his fathers health, due to the fact he may have cancer. Turns out, he doesn't. So they got ice cream.

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What's green and has wheels? Dave Matthew's Band

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Yes.

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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I heard you like playing basketball at night. My ears are fully functional in comprehension of human language and therefore I am able to listen and remember words that are told by others.

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If a tree falls in the forest and it does it make a sound? No, Trees can't talk

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Knock Knock Who's there? A package, the UPS man is already back in his truck.

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Why can't Michael Jackson play chess? Cause he's dead.

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Want to hear a funny joke? Sure. Women's Rights. That's not even a joke. You don't get it. It's not even a sentence.

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What did the boy say to the Vietnam veteran? Where are your legs?

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Knock knock Who's there? The police Ahh shit

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Your momma's so fat when she walks into a restaurant she orders salad.

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What's The Difference Between a Chicken and a Human. Well a Chicken Is A Chicken and a Human Is a Human.

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light-bulb? I'm melting!

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What do you call a kid without brothers or sisters What? a chinese Boy!!!!!!! lol ;)

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Why did Billy drop his ice cream? He was hit by a bus

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What does Rubens Barrichelo does with his F1 championship trophies? He never got one.

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Why did Billy cry? He had Pubic Lice

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What was the pirate movie rated? It was rated R for its graphic depiction of the continuing violence in Somalia.

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What do you do when you come across a tiger in the jungle? Wipe it off and apologize.

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How many dead lions can feed a bluejay? Bluejays don't eat dead or living lions, so this is highly improbable.

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Your mom is so ugly, she buys groceries at the grocery store.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops