Q. What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? A. Robin, get in the car.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did the people say to each other when they ate the orange? Orange you glad I didn't eat you:) HAHAHAA orange you glad that I am good at telling jokes!

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did one tree say to the other? "Hey Phil, how's it going?

thumb_up thumb_down +12

While walking along the beach, a man stubs his toe on a half buried lamp. He picks it up, dusts it off, and a enormous Genie appears in front of him. "You have released me from my 10,000 year imprisonment. I will grant you 3 wishes to repay you." says the Genie. The man quickly uses his 1st wish for wealth and the 2nd for the love of a beautiful woman. Unable to think of a 3rd wish and seeing the sunken look on the Genie's face, he wished for the Genie's freedom. The Genie uses his unrestrained powers to kill the man, resurrect Hitler and enslave the human race.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

His Royal Highness was hunting in the forest accompanied by his squires and hunting dogs. A man, screaming, ran wildly out of the brush and addressed the hunting party. He said, "DON'T SHOOT! I AM NOT A MOOSE!! PLEASE DO NOT SHOOT!!!!" The king calmly raised his rifle to his eye and fired, hitting the man in the temple, and instantly killing him. A squire frantically turned to the king and said "Sire! Why did you kill this man?! He CLEARLY said he was not a moose!" The King replied "Oh! I thought he said he WAS a moose..."

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Two black men jump off a cliff, who wins? Wins what?

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What happens to a black man when he jumps into a pool of clorox? He turns white!

thumb_up thumb_down +12

how many dead babies can you fit into a blender? 17 how do you get them out? Tortilla chips, but you'd be arrested by that time anyway because you just murdered 17 babies

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's worse than getting stabbed? Getting stabbed twice. What's worse than getting stabbed twice? Getting stabbed three times. What's worse than gettin..... Why does it matter?!?!?! U should be dead by then!

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why was the boy laughing? Because

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Knock knock Who's there? Hello??? .....

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did the man say to the woman he was in love with? Sure, I understand and I'm okay with being just friends.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Q:Why did the cop arrest the black guy with a gun? A: because he shot a family and when the funeral was held he cooked a grenade killed everyone and peed on there grave, later he rapped two dogs and stabbed a crippled then tea bagged a horse to death.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Roses are grey, Violets are grey, I am a dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A black man has a job.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Onions are like loved ones... They are both nouns. And you cry when you cut into them.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

How do you get a child off a swing? Throw a fridge at him

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the cat cross the road? To see its mom who was lying dead on the other side

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's brown, smells like shit, and are annoying as hell? Taking shits

thumb_up thumb_down +10

kill yourself

thumb_up thumb_down +10

How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen take? Enough to give him a bad reputation, but not enough to kill him

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Joe goes to the bathroom with someone in the next stall named Bill Bill: "Hi" Joe: "Hi" Bill: "How you doing" Joe: "Good" Bill: "You traveling" Joe: "Yes to Alabama" Bill: "Yeah, I got to go a guy in the next stall answering all my questions bye"

thumb_up thumb_down +10

an orange and an apple are both in a fruit bowl, the apple says nothing as its an apple and apple's cant speak its just an apple

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Hey wanna hear joke? ........ yeah .......me too

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops