When is it okay for priests to touch underage boys? Ash Wednesday, they have place ash using their hands on the boys foreheads.

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brittney griner

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What is Santa's favorite color? Blue

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, well at least they were, until I met you!

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Chuck Norris doesn't wait in traffic, he takes the subway

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I like pie. I know you do too.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? The chicken was locked in a cage and the nearest intersection is about a mile away.

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What did the girl say to the mute? "Why are you so quiet?" How did the mute respond? He flipped her off.

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What do you call a muslim flying a plane? A pilot

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What's funnier then 24... The Holocost

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Q.When is a dog, not a dog? A. never

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Why did the blonde throw her alarm clock out the window? Because it was broken.

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Your grandma and your mom drove of a cliff, who survived? Both of them they didn't drive off a cliff

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What do you call a partially deaf obese man? Anything you want, it's unlikely that he'll hear you. If he does manage to catch what you said, your chances of outrunning him are very good considering that he's likely to tire before you, unless you're overweight yourself of course. If this is the case then perhaps you should hit the gym, obesity is a growing problem in the Western world and greatly increases your chance of heart disease and/or diabetes.

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Several men are in a bar a tall white man named James orders a round of shots for all of the people they all have a fun time untill James gets into a car with Derrick who is not sober they drive right into a sick childrens hospital and cause many frantic wild fires throughout the town. They all end up in jail for an unrelated cause

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Why does a ginger have no friends? Because it is a non sentient horizontal stem used for seasoning food, and thus incapable of forming complex social and emotional bonds with conscious organisms.

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What did the man do after he got in his car with out his keys? He started it up and drove Away

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My friend Edward found a worm in his apple. Edward happened to be a lemur. Lemurs eat both plants and worms, so he ate them both.

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Why cant Stevie Wonder and Ray Charles read? Because they are blind you racist.

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So a deaf man is listening to the radio.

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Crowded elevator smell different to midget-Confucius say.

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what did the blonde mail to her boyfriend? nothing, blonde's can't write.

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three jews walk into a bar. then a bear mauls them.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops