Facebook How i met my mother

knock knock whos there? your neighbor, dude im sorry but i swear i didnt see your kid on my drive way.

I got a joke for ya. George W. Bush was our president. He is a joke, but no one is laughing.

A man and his friend go hunting,one falls in a hole and appears dead. The friend calls 911 and asks what to do, the operator says ok first we need to make sure he's dead. The friend checks his pulse and finds out he is living, then an ambulance is sent and the hunter lives with minor injuries.

Doctor, Doctor I think your gay. thats because i am

why is the man laughing. he isn't, he's just been informed he has testicular cancer.

200,000 people are homeless! ...this year in america!

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coach of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

Why wouldn't Michael J. Fox make a good Sniper? Because he has no military experience.

What did Tom get for his 5th Birthday ? Nothing, he died when he was 2 years old

A man walked into a bar. He was meeting his friends but was 30 minutes early so he went down the road to buy some food. He had recently began dieting after watching a series of lifestyle programs which informed him of the potential risks involved with high cholesterol and blood pressure levels. He purchased a garden salad and a freshly squeezed orange juice, and made it back to the bar in time to meet his friends.

Why are small clowns and baby's alike? They both dreadfully die when hit in the face with an axe!

What did the cat say to the dog? - meow!

there was a black man his head looked like a peanut

Q. What do you call a guy who only drinks lite beer. A. His name.

Why did the armadillo fall off the cliff?

how come the exorcist eat crème brülé? because that deserves a carlsburg

Vagina.

how big is a black mans penis? idk ask his wife

What did the little boy get from his visit to Penn State? Raped.

Why does Rupert The Bear wear checkered trousers? Because he's a twat.

What did Hitler say to his empire, A lot of stuff that I am to lazy to look up, all i know that the holocaust was bad and we shouldn't repeat it.

Jinoo walks into a club it's not a club anymore it's a slaying factory

What's the difference between a bird and a fish ? They're both different, except the fish.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...