Holy mother moley! Britain just brexited! Now there's no more Britain. Britain is all gone.

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*Brother comes downstairs wet and naked* Mom: Did you enjoy your shower?

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What is the saddest thing in a porno? He doesn't really love her.

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What's the difference between a plum and an elephant? They're both purple but the elephant is gray.

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How do you get a girl out of a tree? You throw a refrigirator at her.

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knock knock? who's there? a guy..... so the man open's the door and the guy clutching a knife stabs repeatedly at his chest killing him and drags his body down into his cellar locking him away from the open world. by Mad James

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What did the pencil say to the pen? Nothing.

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How many black people does it take to change a lightbulb? The same amount as white people, stop being racist.

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10+10=20. 20+20=40 40-10=30 I have 2 penises.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Gestapos.

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why was the teenage girl crying? She was molested as a child

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My Grandma has Alzheimers and always repeats what she says. My Grandma has Alzheimers and always repeats what she says. (Submitted by Aidan)

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What do you do when a blonde throws a pin at you? Give her a time-out. Throwing sharp objects is not okay.

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What is blue and flies across the room? A baby with a punctured lung.

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You know what helps with back pain? If you lick my butt hole.

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What do you call a fish with one eye? A fish

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whats black and blue and white all over A little caucasian boy who is being abused by his parents

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I was so fat I went on a diet

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Chuck Norris goes to the mars to fight the marshuns he then die's soon after because there is lack of oxegen on mars and theres no marshuns.

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says why the long face? The horse does not reply because it is a horse. He then is confused of where he is and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a couple stools.

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A man goes to the beach to meat babes, but know one seemes to notice him. The man notices another man with a crowed of beautiful women surrounding him. Later that day he stops the man and asks him, how do you get all those girls? the man replies put a potato in your bathing suit. so the next day the man puts a potato in his bathing suit, this time he notices girls walking by and laughing, he goes to the man at the end of the day and asks why it did not work, the man replies, next time try putting the potato in the front

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What did the man do when he found a lost dog in his yard? He shot it. This was a very old, lonely, and distressed man with many unresolved problems resulting from his childhood in poverty.

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*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and think it's original because I changed one word*

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? rockband

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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