what do u call a lesbian dinosaur? lickalotopuss

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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Wanna hear a bathroom joke? YOU TRYIN' TO KILL US?!?

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What do you get if you cross a sheep with a kangaroo? Don't be ridiculous. First of all, scientifically this is near impossible and secondly, what use would a kangaroo with wool be? Sheepdogs would become obsolete and they would be a nightmare to shear. Imbecile.

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4 out of 4 questions. You want to cross the lake, but alligators live in that river. How do you get across? The alligators aren't there. They're all at the lion king's meeting.

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Q: What did Bob want for dinner? A: Cheese Burger, Fries, Coke, No Beverage

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a preist sees a rabbi on the street while taking a walk. he says hi and proceeds to have a nice conversation as they are good friends despite their religous differences

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What happens when a black guy jumps you? Well its no diffrent to when anyone else jumps you!

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Are you from Tennesse because my uncle grew up there and I was wondering if you knew him.

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What do you call Justin Bieber having sex with a woman? Two people of the opposite gender having sex.

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What's sad about 5 black men falling off a cliff? The master has no slaves.

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What do you call a man with a fork stuck in his head? A man with a fork stuck in his head

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"Honey im home!" but his honey was dead on the floor along with his 3 kids.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the first monkey why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? monkey see monkey do why did the fourth monkey fall out of the tree? peer pressure why did the refridgerator fall out of the tree? it lost its footing why did the girl fall down? she was hit by four monkeys and a refridgerator

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roses are red violets are blue I'm ADHD oh look, a squirrel

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a dyslexic made a dessert. it was a bit dry.

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A black man walks into a store and buys a gun based upon the increasing crime rate in his area.

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knock knock. who's there? Alticka Alticka who? Alticka pudding cup.

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I would, but I see an older version of the kid, that suffered so much pain and agony.

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How do you take a Mexican's money? You can't because they have none.

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Oh...okay, good.

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What's worse than a dead baby in a trash can? A dead baby in 10 trash cans.

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What would be the worst thing to do to Helen Keller? Cut her hands off, as it would destroy her last chance at communication and re-arranging her house so she often fell nub first over chairs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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