Why did the chicken cross the road? Well it's goal was to get to the other side however unfortunately a giant gorilla picked up a car; threw it at a nearby building causing it to collapse; setting off a massive explosion causing all of the buildings on that side of the street to collapse. As the whole other side of the street was covered in rubble making it impossible for the chicken to get to the other side, so the chicken decided to turn around and go home.

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A black man and a mexican are in a car. Whos driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had come upon them and an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful time. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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i fell like im going to reverse john becase i ate a bikle penis jackson

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Q: Why couldn't the skeleton go to the party A: He had a boner

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What's the difference between a bird? Both legs are the same, especially the left one

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A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, we have a drink named after you!" Surprised, the grasshopper replies, "You have a drink named 'Bob'?"

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Knock knock. Who's there? Falafel. Falafel who? I falafel. You feel awful? Ha, ha, ha! Oh, what a kneeslapper! Oh, God! Thanks for the laugh, I was feeling a little down and I... No, I just meant I ate a falafel. Oh. Yeah.

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what did the indian boy say to his friend? I wish you were real

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What did the dancing amphibious landing craft say to the carrot faced caterpillar? wanna get in its cold

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one day there was an ugly barnicle. he was SSSOOO ugly that everyone died the end -patrick

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Your mom is so fat, every time she swims in the ocean, north america sinks because of the high water displacement caused by her giant body mass. (V1-V2=m)

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Roses are red. Violets are red. Sunflowers are red. My garden is on fire.

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Why did the boy drop the ice cream? Because he had a seizure.

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hey John will you make some copies

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What's black and hanging from the tree in my backyard? My black, tree-hugging friend.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Repeat after me... I'matote ulbu twad Now say that all together Im a total butt wad

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how do you get a clown off a swing? hit him with an axe

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Martin Skrtel walks into a bar The bar breaks, Martin then pays for any damages caused

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How do you make a puppy stop barking? Throw a brick at it.

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Where did little Annie go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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Jimmy tells his mom he wants to be a Firefighter when he grows up to which the mother replies, "You can't Jimmy, you have leukemia."

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What's the difference between your jokes and your penis? No one laughs at your jokes.

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Wanna hear a bathroom joke? YOU TRYIN' TO KILL US?!?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops