Why did the chicken cross the road? It had just escaped from the slaughterhouse and ran for its life.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She didn't pass her driving test.

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An impolite guy walks into a bar... and doesn't apologize to the bar.

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Arsonist: Hey, did you listen to my mixtape? ... It's really good.

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How many boring people does it take to change a light bulb? One.

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Whats the difference between a baby and a watermelon? Ones fun to hit with a sledgehammer. The other one is a watermelon.

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why did the boy fall down? he was shot

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That other group is a *********************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************** From Jackson Edwards

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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What is green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

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How is nothing something if it is nothing?...

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How do you torture Helen Keller? Waterboarding.

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What's brown and sticky? a stick

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whats worse then 9/11? -George W. Bush

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Tim tebow is the anti christ

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One day, I was looking at my brand new wooden table, and I thought, "wow, that is a very nice brand new wooden table." And then my dog peed on it. I killed the dog.

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What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Having a refrigerator fall on you

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So a gay guy walks in a bar and asks for a drink. The bartender says "We don't serve your kind, get out." The gay says he will drink in the corner. Later, a construction worker walks into the bar. He says," Man, I'm so thirsty I could drink the sweat off a cows balls." The gay guy in the corners says," Mooooooooo."

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when life gives you lemmons, chuck em' at beiber

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A man goes to the doctor and says, "Doc I feel like a pair of curtains!" The doctor replied, "That's probably because you're schizophrenic."

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What did Pittsburgh say to Philadelphia? .........Lightbulb.........

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A n antelope walks into a bar and many people leave for the sake of their safety and animal control gets called to escort the antelope out of the bar.

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Husband: Shut up, there is now playing for Real Madrid Woman: So what? come help me clean. Husband:after the game,now shut up. Woman:Everyone knows Barcelona better... Police: So you're saying your wife fell on the knife alone?

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How do you make a baby cry? Break its legs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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