Whats green and can kill you when it falls from a tree? a pool table

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If it looks like a chicken and acts like a chicken, its most likely not a deadly crab running towards you with a knife that has rabies and is afraid of towels.

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Brian finally kissed a girl on the lips... After her daily whore shift of blowjobs -Ap

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Jeremy has 8 apples. Susie has 3. how much does Jason have? Purple because aliens don't like grapes.

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What did Edward Cullen say to the hot girl? Since I am a vampire it is impossible for me to get an erection.

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A Homosexual, a platypus, and a rubber spoon walk into a bar...

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What has wings and windows? A bluebird, I was nodding about the windows!

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Roses are red violits are blue I have ADHD do you like cats?

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Person 1: today my doctor said I'm dyslexic Person 2: oh yeah? Are you ahdd too?

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How do you seat four gay guys at a bar when there's only one stool? Flip the stool over.

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Whats worse than getting punched in the balls? Getting punched in the balls twice.

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Why was the Jamaican man smoking pot? His doctor prescribed it. The man has a serious case of glaucoma.

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a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

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What did the homeless guy get for Christmas? Nothing, he's homeless.

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Knock knock, Who's there The delivery man The delivery man who Just take this package

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The WNBA

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick!

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What do you call a mexican with a broom in his hand? a man who likes to keep his office at his own company clean

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Row, row, row your... Canoe.

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How do you upset an Mexican? Kill his entire family.

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Why does it take longer to build a Blonde snowman as opposed to a regular one? The trip to find a blonde wig suitable for a snowman, especially if you are picky and have a certain wig in mind, generally takes up more time than not searching for a wig at all.

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Why did the chicken cross the road?... To get to the other side.

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have you heard of the new german microwave? it seats about 30

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what do you get when you give an eevee a french stone? Napoleon!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops