A Homosexual, a platypus, and a rubber spoon walk into a bar...

Roses are red violits are blue I have ADHD do you like cats?

What has wings and windows? A bluebird, I was nodding about the windows!

Person 1: today my doctor said I'm dyslexic Person 2: oh yeah? Are you ahdd too?

How do you seat four gay guys at a bar when there's only one stool? Flip the stool over.

Whats worse than getting punched in the balls? Getting punched in the balls twice.

Why was the Jamaican man smoking pot? His doctor prescribed it. The man has a serious case of glaucoma.

a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

What did the homeless guy get for Christmas? Nothing, he's homeless.

Knock knock, Who's there The delivery man The delivery man who Just take this package

The WNBA

What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick!

What do you call a mexican with a broom in his hand? a man who likes to keep his office at his own company clean

How do you upset an Mexican? Kill his entire family.

Row, row, row your... Canoe.

Why does it take longer to build a Blonde snowman as opposed to a regular one? The trip to find a blonde wig suitable for a snowman, especially if you are picky and have a certain wig in mind, generally takes up more time than not searching for a wig at all.

Why did the chicken cross the road?... To get to the other side.

What starts with an 's' and ends with a 'hit'? Shortly after the war, 4 men went to celebrate at the local bar. They all had a grand time there, when a man in black walked into the bar. The man in black knocks once on the bar. "What do you want?" asked the bartender. The man in black didn't respond. This time, the bartender asked again, only louder. The man in black then turned to his right to face the 4 other men celebrating. The man in black then suddenly pulled out a pistol, and shot the 4th man. He then burst into a sprint and ran out of the bar. "He's hit," the 3rd man shouted, "he's hit!"

have you heard of the new german microwave? it seats about 30

Yo mama is so fat that she has to buy plus size clothes because small size clothes would be inappropriate for her to wear.

what do you get when you give an eevee a french stone? Napoleon!!!

When life gives you lemons.... Impossible life is not a person nor a dispenser of lemons.

why did the titanic sink, it was hit by a iceberg

What's do a woman's vagina and a camel's toe have in common? Other than being parts of two mammals, they have nothing in common.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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