Q. Why did the Unicorn die A. It got hit by a Bus

thumb_up thumb_down -25

A man goes to the beach to meat babes, but know one seemes to notice him. The man notices another man with a crowed of beautiful women surrounding him. Later that day he stops the man and asks him, how do you get all those girls? the man replies put a potato in your bathing suit. so the next day the man puts a potato in his bathing suit, this time he notices girls walking by and laughing, he goes to the man at the end of the day and asks why it did not work, the man replies, next time try putting the potato in the front

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor

thumb_up thumb_down -25

when geese fly in a v formation, why is one side always longer then the other? Because you touch yourself at night...

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What is blue and flies across the room? A baby with a punctured lung.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Theory: Jesus: Father why must I go die in order to defeat sin, is sin not a product of humans? God: SHHH! You want humans to know they are stronger than us? Real life: Later on the cross Jesus: FATHER WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYY! God: *Thunder* Moral: Makes sense... Kinda? Maybe? A bit? I honestly do not get it :(

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Q: What is a laptop that sings? A: A Dell

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Humpty dumpty sat on a wall Humpty dumpty ha a great fall Hunpty dumpty's skull was split in two

thumb_up thumb_down -25

If u read thus your awsome .... And if your a emo kid with rainbow hair and a 3 inch penis then NO your bad

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Yo mama is so fat that her belly button reaches the door 15 minutes before she does- by Adam Chebali

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What do you call a Black person in a city with high crime rates? Whatever their name happens to be.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

womens rights

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What is worse than finding a dead baby in a dumpster? F*cking midgets

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Person 1: Knock knock. Person 2: Come in.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Roses are red Violets are blue Plants are green because of the high levels of mitochondria in their cells.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

what did the Nazi do when his Jewish rabbit died? silly Nazi rabbits don't have religion

thumb_up thumb_down -27

A programmer, and engineer and an accountant meet up for an after work drink. Afterwards they go home to their separate apartments and think how socially inadequate they are.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

A father of four joins the military. He returns home after his service.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

42

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Q: How many black people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: One

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What's the hardest part about eating a vegetable? Finishing the wheelchair.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

so the weather's nice...

thumb_up thumb_down -29

A bar walked into a bar. To get to the other horse.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops