If a tree falls in the forest and it does it make a sound? No, Trees can't talk

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She didn't pass her driving test.

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when life gives you lemmons, chuck em' at beiber

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An impolite guy walks into a bar... and doesn't apologize to the bar.

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Knock knock Who's there? The police. Your husband has been killed in an accident.

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Where is my tractor?

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Whats the difference between a baby and a watermelon? Ones fun to hit with a sledgehammer. The other one is a watermelon.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I am not using commas That is improper punctuation.

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What do you get when you cross a blond with a plank of wood? A blond with a plank of wood on her head.

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What is green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

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Why are asians so smart? Because they study very hard and learn the material.

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The sons of modern psychology: COCAINE MOTHERF8CKERS! COMING OUT IN YOUR CINEMA RENTAL STORE YESTERDAY! Sold out. (yesterday)

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why did the jew drop his coin? beacuse a nazi killed him before he put it in his pocket

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An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

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you want to hear a joke? the goverment.

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How the hell did Susie get on the swing anyway I don't know you tell me?

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What did the man on a business trip to Japan say to his wife on the phone? The nuclear reactor in the next city over is melting down as we speak. If I don't see you again, I love you.

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Why did Harry get in the taxi? His mother told him to put his seatbelt on.

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if you read this you are gay

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How you learn to juggle? You ask someone for their balls.

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So a gay guy walks in a bar and asks for a drink. The bartender says "We don't serve your kind, get out." The gay says he will drink in the corner. Later, a construction worker walks into the bar. He says," Man, I'm so thirsty I could drink the sweat off a cows balls." The gay guy in the corners says," Mooooooooo."

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Guy 1: So who did you have sex with? Guy 2: I was Fucking Austria. Guy 1: What do you mean? Guy 2: Look it up.

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what did the man say to the other man? hi

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Why hasn't Justin Bieber gone through puberty. Usher Chopped his balls off.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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