Roses are brown, Violets are brown, Who shit in my garden?

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420

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An owl and a squirrel where siting in a tree, watching a farmer go by. The owl then turned to the squirrel and said nothing... cos owls can't talk. The owl then eats the bird because it is a bird of prey

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Why is there no gambling in Africa? Because there's no money in Africa.

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what do you call two arabs flying a plane? a pilot and a co-pilot

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Q: what do you call a camel with a garbage bag on its head? A: A ziploc baggie

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shit is shit, even if you paint it purple; its still shit

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What happens to a black man when he jumps into a pool of clorox? He turns white!

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Q:What does a black guy say when you steal his fried chicken right in front of him? A:"please restrain from taking food that does not belong to you. If you had kindly asked i would have kindly given you some, and right in front of me too! In all my life I've never seen such rudeness and i grew up in the Bronx."

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Why did the pumpkin stop using the jack hammer? Pumpkins cannot use power tools since they are nothing but orange gourds. But, [for sport] say this ‘pumpkin’ was incarnate; one could assume he was done with his demolition work. He then would return the portable drill to the rental facility and get his deposit back.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A pizza is a tasteful meal and a Jew is a person of Israeli decent.

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One day a child goes to the doctor and says, "it hurts when do this" as he pokes his throat. The doctor, after several well-performed deep tissue testing, diagnosed the child with stage four esophageal cancer. The child cried himself to sleep that night.

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How do you stop a group of black guys from fighting? go over to them and ask them politely to stop.

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why did josh pick up the quarter because he's a jew

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Why didnt the car turn on? Cause the keys werent in the ignition

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What did the cover say when it fell off the bed? Oh sheet!

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Chuck Norris' balls were so big that he went to the doctor to get them checked on and it was discovered that he had testicular cancer.

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whats funny about a jew burning? Nothing......

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What do you get if you give a black man more than 5 watermelons? Jeff the Killer.

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What do you call a black man on a swing? Depends on what his name is

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A young child drops his ice cream and began to cry. Why are you crying asks his mother Because I dropped my ice cream said the child

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Q-why did the dog run away? A-he was Michael vick's dog

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Whats the best way to get to a girls heart? A knife.

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What's worse than a dead baby? 2 dead babies

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops