Knock knock I don't play games, go away! Knock knock How did you get in my house? Knock knock Stay back I have a weapon! Knock knock What are you!!! Knock knock Oh god, someone please help! Knock knock What do you want, I can give you money. Knock knock Just don't hurt my family, please. Knock knock!!! WHO'S THERE!!! I am.

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Why were there a series of riots in london? The police shot and killed a man who was threatening them and thus caused his friends to get angry and caused other people to lose control.

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What did Hitler get for Christmas? Some shoelaces for his shoes so he could tie his little knotsies.

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woman..parallel parking

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What's worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Three bee stings.

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-_- i like trains ... -_-

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baby seal walks into a club

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A police officer walks into a doughnut shop. He approaches the cashier and hands him 20$. He says "Here, I saw you drop this on your way in" he promptly leaves the store.

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A duck and a chicken walk into a bar. How improbable.

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Q. Why did the Chineese man eat a banana? A. He was hungry, and he was craving a banana.

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A man walks into a bar and orders a sprite. Everyone in the bar looks and him funny and then laughs. He then tells them, "I would rather satisfy myself with a cool lemon-lime drink than put the poisonous toxins of alchohol into my blood stream."

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why did the boy drop his ice-cream? because he got hit by a bus

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I'm Jewish

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A dinosaur is walking down the street. He is soon confronted by a human. The human says to the dinosaur, "Hey, your a dinosaur." Which the dinosaur replies with, "Yes, yes i am." The dinosaur then stands there for a few seconds wondering why he is in the same time period as the human. And as to why a dinosaur would talk.

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what do u call 2 puerto rician men playing basketball? won on won

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Why shouldn't you drink and drive? Because you might hit a bump and spill your drink.

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Have you seen the Hobbit? Yes they're taking him to Isengard

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Did you hear about the guy in town living in a tyre, he got a puncture now hes living in a flat.

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How do you teach another person's son to ride a bike? You don't. Let his real parents teach him to ride a bike.

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because it thought that it would somehow increase its chances of survival.

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Why did the girl fall from the swing? She was laughing at an anti-joke.

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Roses are blue, Violets are red, Wow, I screwed up, Give me head.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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What do you call a baby girl that has grown up? A women

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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