Q:How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? A:Depends on the volume of said tub.

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i just got pulled over by a cop. he asked me if i had been drinking, i said no. he asked me to step out of my car so he could look inside i looked nervous, and had no other choice to step out. he knew there was something in there he looked in and saw it THE REFRIDGERATOR

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Yo mamma so fat, she is going on a diet and is very sensitive about her weight.

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nick ya honkin of b.o m8

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Roses are grey, violets are grey, everything is grey, i'm a dog.

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Steven Hawkin ran a marathon.

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OR SOMETHING! VOLUME ONE SPECIAL ALPHA MAN EDITION: What do you do if you are in the jungle, and surrounded by a tiger, and a jaguar and have only one bullet left in the rifle? You shoot the damn jaguar in its tire, and RIDE THE GODDAMN TIGER BACK HOME! MORAL MAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN! THE FRIENDLY NEIGHBORHOOD R*PIST!(Yes I also wrote the original kay?)

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The itsy bitsy spider climbed up the water spout. Heavy rain came down and killed him.

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Why is little johnny sad? He won the lottery but then found out the next day he had cancer and cried in a corner.

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So a horse walks into a bar... I forget the rest of the joke but you're mom is a whore..

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Knock knock.. Who's there? Breaking. Breaking who? Im breaking up with you.

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A neutron walks into a bar. He orders a drink and ponders why his mother gave him the name, "A neutron."

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WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

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A Dog walked into a bar and the bartenter said 'What can i get you' the dog dident say aneything cuz its a dog!!!!!

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you're mommas so fat that her doctor says she is morbitly obese and may die of a heart failure later in life

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How do you make a bull angry? Light it on fire

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How do you address a gay, jewish, african male? You can't, as addressing a person would imply mailing them. And that would violate their human rights. As well, the cost of shipping a package of that size would be rather prohibitive

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Whats a welfare? Its what keeps you alive.

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Why was 6 afraid of 8 because 8 kidnap 7

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a serial rapist.

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Q. What's brown and circular? A. MEATBALLS!

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What's blue and has two windows ? The sky, i lied about the windows.

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Wanna hear something funny? David is addicted to mw3 like the other 3 million people!

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What do you call a man with one ear? A one-eared man.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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