Why did the Polish man cross the road? Because the doctors was across the road, and he had a doctor appointment in five minutes time.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it was hit by a car

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Why is it bad to smoke in a public place? Because secondhand smoke may cause lung cancer.

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hi

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what do you call a blonde with black hair? Artificial intelligence

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Cornelius went to the dcotor and got a sticker and a lollipop for being a good patient. He later went home and shoved the lollipop stick up his dick hole and started wildly masturbating. I forgot to mention Cornelius was 42 years old.

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why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have AIDS we're dying together

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Why wasn't the black man allowed on the golf course? Because a wealthy business man had rented out the entire course for a very important international investor.

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It's the police sir. There's been an accident.

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Why was the man late for work? Because he slept in.

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Why didn't the black man eat a packet of crisps? Because he didn't have any.

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A boy bought a dozen roses, eleven real, one fake. He looks deeply into his girlfriends eyes, hers looking back, brimming with love and affection as he says, "I slept with your sister."

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A guy walks into a bar. He then comes home at 4 a.m. to beat his wife.

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How many lemurs does it take to paint a wall It depends on how hard you throw them Why did Jane fall off the swing She has no arms Why did Jack drop his ice cream cone He got hit by a bus Did you know that if you pretend to eat salt you can actualy taste it Do this in public. Why was 6 afraid of 7 Numbers can't think This is the original anti joke A man walked into a bar he is an alcoholic and is distroying his family. Fin a penny pick it up and all the day you will have good luck Until you get hit with a car door. A man is SCUBA diving when he is almost out of air so he takes one breath an holds it to the surface The trip is so long that his lungs explode do to a change in pressure so he died.

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A woman wearing a very fancy, striped sweater walks into a bar and sits down. The bar tender asks her “what’ll it be”?. The girl replies “Just a beer for me”. As this happens a child in Africa dies from complications due to starvation.

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A man comes home after a long days work. It is late at night and he gets in bed with his wife who is already asleep. Later that night he gets up for a glass of water and returns to the bed room to see that his wife doesn't appear to be breathing and calls 911. He then realizes that this isn't his house and he leaves.

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A farmer was robbed and complained to the sheriff's department that he suspected it was a black man behind the crime. "How do you know this for sure?" The sheriff asked him. He replied, "I chased him into the night, it was dark and I couldn't see him"

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have you seen ray charles' house? neither has he.

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How do you make an anti-joke? Like this....

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Why did the man cry... He got hit with a fridge

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So everything, the chat we had before was all you know, a game so I would call you? I am not sleepy but I can wait until you can confirm everything.

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When Kylie and Conner have a baby he will have a centimeter Schmeter!

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A: Knock, knock. A: Knock, knock! A: Um ... Knock, knock! B: Sorry, I didn't want to answer the door.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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