Why did a blind man buy a violin. To learn how to play a violin.

whats purple with fur?nothing mammals cannot have purple fur

What's green and fluffy? Red fluff, if you're color blind.

a man walks into a bar, his alcoholism is slowly destroying his family

A man is being followed by a large swarm of mosquitoes. He eradicates them by spraying himself with an insect repellent that has a high deet concentration.

Why was Hitler a bad person? He killed himself.

roses are red Jacob's a Jew the holocaust was funny Haha f**k you

What happens when you stick your finger in a pencil sharpener? Blood everywhere.

how long has dibey got left like :)

Whats white and all over my room? paint

Why did Harry get in the taxi? His mother told him to put his seatbelt on.

if you read this you are gay

How do you keep a blonde busy? The best way to keep somebody busy is to make sure they have something to do, like get a job or a hobby or do some chores. The color of their hair is irrelevant.

My friend told me to break a leg before the show. I disobeyed him and injured no one. It's just a figure of speech.

Why was the pencil case unzipped? Because it wasn't zipped up.

Knock knock. Who's there? Your doorbell is broken.

Are you a tree? No.

Why did the little girl fall off of the swing? She had previously been in a car accident, in which all of her close family died and she was the only survivor. Since both her arms were stuck in between crushed components of the car, they had to be amputated on the spot. She was testing out the prosthetic arms she had been given when they failed, causing her to get a concussion, and putting her in a coma for the rest of her life.

Reporter: So, how do you feel knowing you don't have some place to work when you walk out of your house because of that tornado? Guy: "Well, it feels even worse knowing I don't have a house to walk out of. . ."

What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Getting rape.d by a giant scorpion.

What do you call a kid without brothers or sisters What? a chinese Boy!!!!!!! lol ;)

Let's make like your mother and walk out on your family during pre-adolescence.

Here's a joke for u Hahaha suck on it I wasnt going to make u laugh o yea ur mom died

Knock knock Who's there? Yolanda I do not know anyone by that name. I am sorry Oh I must be at the wrong house. My apologies. Oh, it's alright. Have a nice day You too. Take care!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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