Your mother is so ugly that when she looks in the mirror she feels bad about her appearance.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Ostrich. Ostrich who? No no I don't have a formal name, I'm just telling you I'm an ostrich.

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A: Knock knock B: Who’s there? A: The police B: The police who? A: Ma’am, your son is dead.

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A man goes to the doctor and says, "Doc I feel like a pair of curtains!" The doctor replied, "That's probably because you're schizophrenic."

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pigs are sometimes pink GOSH

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What do a duck and a bike have in common? They both have handle bars except for the duck

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why was the boy sad? his friend got hit by a bus.

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Why doesn't Santa come in the summer? Because it's not Christmas.

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Why did the man with no arms, and no legs knock on your door? He can't, he has no arms!

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68

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Why did the dog cross the road? He was on a walk with his owner so they used a crosswalk to safely get back home.

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There's an American, an African, and a Chinese walking down the street. Because the bar is down there.

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Two astronauts go kayaking in the Sahara Desert. How many pancakes does it take to shingle doghouse? Purple, because ice cream has no bones.

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Why are asians so smart? Because they study very hard and learn the material.

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Har har hey

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To mamas so fat shes fat

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Sonic

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Why was the baby going so fast? It was tied to a bus.

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What's brown and sticky? a stick

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Why was Hitler a bad person? He killed himself.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I am colourblind so screw you!

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When life gives you skittles, throw them at random people and say "taste the freaking rainbow!"

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How's a raven like a writing desk. you really are alice.

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hey i just F****d u and this is crazy so delete the number and keep the baby

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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