Why did Sally fall off the swing? She didn't have arms.

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Why did Billy cry? He had Pubic Lice

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What's the difference between Republicans and Democrats? There is a series of boxes which one can choose to check on a ballot, officially registering an individual with a certain party. Available parties include the Green Party, The American Communist Party, The Republican Party, and the Democratic Party among others. Republicans choose to check the Republican box, Democrats choose to check the Democrat box. Also Republicans are closet homosexuals and Democrats are terrorists.

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How come the black man couldn't be seen on film? He could be seen on film, he's not a vampire.

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if you read this you are gay

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How you learn to juggle? You ask someone for their balls.

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Where is my tractor?

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What's the longest, hardest thing on a black man? His femur.

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A baby seal walks into a club...

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whats brown, lying in a ditch, and is covered in cookie crumbs? a girl scout that got hit by a truck

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There's an American, an African, and a Chinese walking down the street. Because the bar is down there.

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What do you call a man who stole from a thief? A thief, no matter whom you are stealing from the consequences are dire.

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Whats the difference between a baby and a watermelon? Ones fun to hit with a sledgehammer. The other one is a watermelon.

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Baman: What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? Piderman: What? Baman: They're all gone!

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There is an Asian, an American, and a Mexican on a falling plane. The pilot announces that the plane is plummeting out of the sky and says that he needs to drop the cargo. The pilot drops the cargo but the plane is too heavy still. The pilot tells the passengers to drop some personal belongings. The Asian drops rice, the Mexican drops his guns, and the American throws the Mexican and yells "Remember the Alamo!".

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Why did a blind man buy a violin. To learn how to play a violin.

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I saw a man lying on the floor. He ate too much cake.

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What has four legs, is green and furry, and if it falls out of a tree it will kill you? A pool table.

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Why did the alligator travel through time? To get to the other side.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It had just escaped from the slaughterhouse and ran for its life.

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whats funny with two wheels? A kid falling off his bike

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A Mexican, a Jew and an African walk into a bar. Now, it seem it was the Jew's turn to pay for drinks. So, all three ordered drinks, and the Jew paid for them.

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Did you know Helen Keller had a tree house? Well, she did.

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Knock knock Who's there? The police Ahh shit

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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