Want to hear a joke? Me neither.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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What do you get when lettuce and oranges come together? I dont know, thats why I asked you.

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Why did the circus clown lose his balance? He had a seizure while on his unicycle, fell off, and bumped his head, leading to significant blunt trauma in the brain. Weeks later, after waking up from a coma, the doctors discover that he can no longer speak anything other than gibberish. His friends and family decide that he cannot go on living this way and decide to pull the plug.

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The U.S. economy is in poor condition and it's downfall would have repercussions throughout the entire world.

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My Grandma has Alzheimers and always repeats what she says. My Grandma has Alzheimers and always repeats what she says. (Submitted by Aidan)

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What do you call a fish with one eye? A fish

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How does camon Die? He kills himself because he didnt make it into the marine corps

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When life throws you lemons, duck cuz they freakin' hurt

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Yo mama is so fat that her belly button reaches the door 15 minutes before she does- by Adam Chebali

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How can you tell if a man is choking? Stick a fridge down his throat

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What does a man say to his annoying friend? Please stop annoying me now.

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My momma's so ugly she had to get plastic surgery. Now I need it.

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What did the blind, deaf, and dumb child get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Q. Why did the Unicorn die A. It got hit by a Bus

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Q: What is a laptop that sings? A: A Dell

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What did the fly say when he went to Dunkin Donuts? Can I have a doughnut?

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Roses are red violets are flowers jordan and me did it for hours If you know what i mean xxx

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Humpty dumpty sat on a wall Humpty dumpty ha a great fall Hunpty dumpty's skull was split in two

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What is blue and flies across the room? A baby with a punctured lung.

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Chuck Norris can right-click with a mac mouse

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Yo mammals so stupid, she's got AIDS!

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor

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What happend to the boy with no family? he died in a tragic car accident along with his family

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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