why did Kelsey fall off the swing? because she has no arms Knock Knock who's there? not Kelsey

Why didn't Hitler like steak? He was a vegetarian.

Q.When is a dog, not a dog? A. never

What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot.

What did the Jew say right before a boy threw a quarter in a fountain? Make a wish.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I'm chuck norris. And I approve of this message.

how many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? one

How many women are in the world? a little over 3.2 billion because statistics show that there are roughly 51-52% females in the whole population of humans

a man walks out of a gas station and sees an indian with his ear to the road. He walks up to him and the indian says "truck... ford truck... large man in front with flannel shirt and trucker cap... german sheperd in passenger seat... licence plate 4563u6." Amazed the other man says " wow, you can tell all of that just by listening to the road?" The indian says "no thats a the truck that ran over me five minuites ago"

A guy walks into a grocery store. He asks a lady where the potatoes are. She says on isle 5 He goes to isle 5, but there are no potatoes.

What did the guy say when he found out his girlfriend had a dick I don't think we should date anymore, you have a dick.

why did michael jackson write black or white he didnt want black people to copy him

Want to hear a joke? No.

How can you tell an Irishman from a frenchman? Well, if you look back at both there heritages...

what do you call two indian men lying next to each other? i dont think there is a name for it but im sure you call them by there names.

there once was a guy named james who like to play video games he was told one day that he was gay and he immediatley consulted a priest for reconciliation

why did mary fall off the swing? Cause she had no arms. Why didnt she get back up? Cause she had no friends. Knock knock whos there Definately not mary !

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because She's Dead.

How many babies does it take it to feed a grown man? It depends on the size of the man, how hungry he is and how big the babies are.

What is red and sits in the corner? A naughty strawberry.

Justin Beiber walks into a bar. He is not served any alcohol because he is not yet 21.

Q:Why did the bunny run up the hill? A:Because he can't run under it.

A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

Roses are red, Violets are Violate and not fucking blue.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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