How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? None,it eats plants.

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why did mary fall off the swing? Cause she had no arms. Why didnt she get back up? Cause she had no friends. Knock knock whos there Definately not mary !

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yo mama so fat, she weighs 478 pounds and is in high risk of cardiovascular dieses and/or heart failure.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because She's Dead.

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How many babies does it take it to feed a grown man? It depends on the size of the man, how hungry he is and how big the babies are.

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. I don't know, I've had a bad day, I can't think straight. Why do you keep asking me these questions? Always talking at me, everyday it's the same - why can't you just shut up?! I would be better off dead, then it would stop, this suffocating blackness. I need to escape...I'm going to do it tonight...pills, something like that...I don't care any longer. Goodbye.

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there once was a guy named james who like to play video games he was told one day that he was gay and he immediatley consulted a priest for reconciliation

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Your mom is so fat that she has diabetes and if she does not stick to her medical diet, her foot will be removed, but she started binge eating because of you in the first place, and if you don't straighten our your life, you will inadvertently be the cause of your mothers death.

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Want to hear a joke? No.

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How can you tell an Irishman from a frenchman? Well, if you look back at both there heritages...

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what do you call two indian men lying next to each other? i dont think there is a name for it but im sure you call them by there names.

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on a scale from a banana to a pound coin - how much do you like the works of antonio vivaldi?

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Justin Beiber walks into a bar. He is not served any alcohol because he is not yet 21.

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How do you get black children to stop jumping on the bed? Tell them it's not allowed and that consequences will ensue if the rules are not followed.

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Roses are red, Violets are Violate and not fucking blue.

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Why was the boy afraid of the dark? he was blind

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What did the chickens say to the other chicken Go away mother clucker

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What is red and sits in the corner? A naughty strawberry.

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A duck walks passed a lemonade stand.

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A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

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Q:Why did the bunny run up the hill? A:Because he can't run under it.

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Why did the football coach go to the bank Answer - to get his quarter back

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Why could the kid not finish his homework? Because it flew out the window on the way to his parents funeral

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops