How many dead babies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Because they're dead, they cant screw in a light bulb. Even if they were alive, it would be highly improbable that a baby could screw in a light bulb.

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What do Batman and Harry Potter have in common? Their parents are dead.

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knock knock whos there open the door and find out

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?J?o?k?e?

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How do you keep a dummy in suspense for 24 hours? Tell him his wife suffered from a severe concussion and that he'll have to wait until morning to see if she's okay

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What's black and crawls around on eight legs? An octopus that just inked itself.

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Q: Why did the blonde stare at the can of frozen orange juice for two hours? A: Because she was dead.

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What makes you hate life and feel good at the same time? A rapist.

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*ahem* what? what. oh I thought you said something

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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There once was a baby named Paul Bunyan who was as big as a house. His mother died at childbirth.

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A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

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Yo mamas so fat when she was standing on a scale a girl walked by and said hey thats my phone number! Yo mamas so fat she broke the family tree!

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Q. How many babies does it take to paint a room? A. Depends on how hard you throw them.

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You read the Terms of Service.

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why did the bird fall out of the tree? Earth's Gravitational pull

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Where did Suzy go during the bombing? Everywhere

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Leading a hike.. Kid falls off a cliff and dies. Who cleans him up? Bear.

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I did not thumb this up myself!... *click* Whoops! At least I am not that douche Moral Man eh? Moral: Whoops! Now if I just don't accidentally type in the answer and...

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Have you heard the one about the monkey who jumped off the roof? Neither have I.

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Two men walk into a bar. The third man ducks.

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Caller:Hello, is this Smellma Pitts Answer: Why yes

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Q. What did the gay kid say to his group of straights? A. 10 dollars to the first one to tip over that little asian boy on the bike.

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What does a camel wear at war? Camelflage

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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