what happens when chuck norris does a push up. he pushes himself up

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Roses are Red, violets are blue,love can not tell how much I love you!!

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What did the elephant say to the poacher? Answer: Dear God in heaven, please don't kill me for my ivory.

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You have friends

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Roses are red Violets are red Tulips are red Bushes are red Trees are red OH SH*T MY GARDEN IS ON FIRE!!!!!

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Why did the Negro say no to the Aryan? It doesnt matter what he said! thats racist!

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So a 12 year old suicide bomber walks in to a military base and kills 31 soldiers. It happened. Look it up.

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Knock knock Who's this? Your neighbor Yes can I help you? Hi, I'm new around here, can you help me find the closest gas station? Turn right over there pass 2 traffic lights it will be on your left Okay, thank you You're welcome

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hahah there are so funny that they are so funny that they are so litteral that i make my self make other people laugh so that they poop

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Why did Jimmy throw butter out the window? Because he had down syndrome

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Why are Jews always so clean? Because they never come out of the shower.

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An overzealous adventurer takes a trip to the Congo in Central Africa. While exploring the dense jungles, he accidentally drinks water that is contaminated with a very rare virus. He lives through the pain of the virus for many years. About 10 years after his trip to Africa, researchers discover a cure for the adventurer's virus. He goes to the clinic to get his shot to kill the virus. Exhilarated, the now cured adventurer runs out of the clinic but fails to look both ways while crossing the street and gets hit by and ambulance and dies.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well it's goal was to get to the other side however unfortunately a giant gorilla picked up a car; threw it at a nearby building causing it to collapse; setting off a massive explosion causing all of the buildings on that side of the street to collapse. As the whole other side of the street was covered in rubble making it impossible for the chicken to get to the other side, so the chicken decided to turn around and go home.

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Why is there no Asprin in the rainforest? Because it's financially viable to sell pharmesuticals in the vast, unpopulated rainforest.

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Q.What has flashing lights and really bad dancing A.Baby haveing an eppilectic fit

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Why did the skeleton stay home from the party He was buried in a coffin underground and, as a matter of fact, wasn't actually invited

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Well, neither has he.

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Patient: "Doctor I think I might be a homosexual." Doctor: "How can you tell?" Patient: "RAAIIINNBOOOOWW!!!"

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What's the difference between Wolfjob and a Jew? Wolfjob is attractive.

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Why was Diana crying? Because she was penetrated.

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What's the difference between a corvette and a pile of dead babies? A pile of dead babies is a horrible tragedy.

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Why did octopus cross the road? Because the road was underwater

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock. Knock. Whos there? Not Sarah.

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You will NEVER guess what just happened!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops