I once heard what I consider the best joke ever: But I am not telling it to you, because this is a the anti-joke section. Moral: You better find the secret "real jokes section" because its there, yeeeeeess yeeeeeeeeees of coursehahahahaha!

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Q: whats worse that sucking at piano A: the world blowing up

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was holding hands with the first. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? It saw a banana. Why did the fourth monkey fall out of the tree? It slipped. Why did the fifth monkey fall out of the tree? It thought this was all a game. Why did the sixth monkey commit suicide? All his friends were gone.

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What did the pear say to the apple? Fred, you delusions are getting worse and i'm getting a divorce.

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How can a chicken be dirty? It can be covered in dirt!

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I was at work today and whilst staring at my beautiful colleague I realised how hard it had got. So I quit

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Why did the black person eat fried chicken Because fried chicken tends to be an abundant food in the African American community and that was the quickest and cheapest weekend afternoon food source nearest to his house. It is also found in many other communities throughout the country and even the world. Oh yeah, he was hungry

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Yo mama is so fat , she died of a heart condition

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hey i just met you and this is crazy so heres my number actually is dolan

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Knock Knock Who's there? 9/11

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems make sense. 5

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how do you get a girl of a swing? puch her off! how do you get her friend of a swing? throw a refridgerator at her!

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It is Scientifically proven that, if you have a shower in china... you get wet

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What do an eagle and a gopher have in common? They can both fly, except for the gopher

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How many alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side

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Why didn't the man say, "Hello, Morgan Freeman!" when his friend walked by? Because his friend wasn't Morgan Freeman.

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A car walked into a bar... wait no it didn't it has wheels.

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Q: Why did the little boy who just got over a terrible sore throat fall down the stairs? A: His legs were brutally torn off by wolves.

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Why doesn't anybody like the octopus? There anti-social creatures by nature

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What's the difference between a boodle and a scoodle? Ladoodle!

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ded on boomer and aodddan

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what do dead babies and turkeys have in common? you eat them on ocasions

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knock knock who's there? Orange Oranges cant talk, so seriously, who's there Your mother Ha ha real funny -mother opens door with her key-

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Why did the golfer take an extra pair of pants to the golf course? In case they ripped and he needed a replacement.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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